brett burkhardt's definitions
One who has been left behind at the bar by a friend and/or ride so that they can hook up. Also known as being whorephaned.
The bartender knew that the chunky girl with the hot friend was going to be a whorephan by midnight the second they walked up to the bar.
by Brett Burkhardt March 9, 2008
Get the whorephanmug. The things a skank will say to let everyone in the room know she or he will fuck anyone, and I mean anyone, who shows even a little interest. Also the sort of things one would say to attract the attention of a skank.
Common skank calls.
"Who wants to do body shots off of me!"
"Woooo, I'm so drunk, I just want to make out!"
"I don't wear underwear to the bar, it just slows me down."
"You, me, the last bathroom stall on the left, two minutes."
"Your friend is cute, do you two want to come back to my place and tag team me?"
"Who wants to do body shots off of me!"
"Woooo, I'm so drunk, I just want to make out!"
"I don't wear underwear to the bar, it just slows me down."
"You, me, the last bathroom stall on the left, two minutes."
"Your friend is cute, do you two want to come back to my place and tag team me?"
by Brett Burkhardt May 12, 2008
Get the Skank Callsmug. Someone who sends in post cards to Post Secret about things that everyone already knows or who brags about their secret being picked.
Josh was a Post Secret poser and would send in post cards every week about the time he pissed his pants at prom. Like no one would figure that one out.
"Tony, don’t be such a Post Secret poser. If you’re going to send in secrets shut up about it."
"Tony, don’t be such a Post Secret poser. If you’re going to send in secrets shut up about it."
by Brett Burkhardt April 27, 2008
Get the Post Secret Posermug. When someone with a hard on grinds it against your ass while dancing, cuddling, spooning, or just standing behind you.
Tanya loved spooning but hated when her boyfriend used it as an excuse to go knocking at the back door all night.
“That guy at the bar was cute but he was knocking at the back door all night on the dance floor and that’s why I didn’t go home with him. Why bring someone home if you know he’s just packing half a roll of Life Savers in his pants?”
“That guy at the bar was cute but he was knocking at the back door all night on the dance floor and that’s why I didn’t go home with him. Why bring someone home if you know he’s just packing half a roll of Life Savers in his pants?”
by Brett Burkhardt April 27, 2008
Get the Knocking at the back doormug. Kara has a purse pooch that she dresses up in tiny feather boas and tiaras.
“If that purse pooch yips one more damn time I swear to Jesus I’m going to use it to beat her owner to death.”
“If that purse pooch yips one more damn time I swear to Jesus I’m going to use it to beat her owner to death.”
by Brett Burkhardt April 27, 2008
Get the Purse Poochmug. When a person insists on having a long, drawn out, pointless conversation on their cell phone when going to the bathroom, especially if it is a public bathroom.
"Dude, is there another bathroom here?"
"No, why?"
"There's some asshole in there talking on his cell phone and I just couldn't take a leak."
"Bathroom blather is so fucking rude."
When I heard I toilet flush I knew that this conversation was just bathroom blather.
"No, why?"
"There's some asshole in there talking on his cell phone and I just couldn't take a leak."
"Bathroom blather is so fucking rude."
When I heard I toilet flush I knew that this conversation was just bathroom blather.
by Brett Burkhardt May 12, 2008
Get the Bathroom Blathermug. When Maryann saw the black velvet painting of Elvis, Princess Diana, and Dale Earnhardt drinking beers while floating on clouds in heaven, she just couldn’t pass it up. It was just TOO great a Trailer Treasure to not buy.
by Brett Burkhardt April 27, 2008
Get the Trailer Treasuremug.