7 definitions by bradleysheadissick
An allusion to Breaking Bad when Walter White breaks into Jesse Pinkman's place to wake him up.
Having consumed an excessive amount of hallucinogenic munchies given to him by Jesse, Walter desperately punches through Jesse's door. He then proceeds to frantically shake Jesse, who is knocked out, because he is coveting Kentucky Fried Chicken like a Catholic priest yearns children, but is himself afraid of acquiring it due to his high.
This line is often used hysterically as a mild inside joke in superior friend groups or in the crack-addicted Breaking Bad community. For instance, when your friend is dead asleep at 3 AM you may scare the life out of them by yelling the three magic words in intermittent order. Doing this after having set their house on fire enhances the experience. As a diehard Breaking Bad fan, it is unlikely that they will be upset at you for committing arson.
There are 27 three-word sentences in which you can yell any of these three words, but the most common are:
• "Jesse Wake Up."
• "Wake Up Jesse."
• "Jesse Jesse Jesse."
Some contemporary parents name their child -- or sometimes all of their children -- "Jesse" so that they can traumatise them with "JESSE WAKE UP!" every morning of their lives. Conveniently, the name is unisexual.
Having consumed an excessive amount of hallucinogenic munchies given to him by Jesse, Walter desperately punches through Jesse's door. He then proceeds to frantically shake Jesse, who is knocked out, because he is coveting Kentucky Fried Chicken like a Catholic priest yearns children, but is himself afraid of acquiring it due to his high.
This line is often used hysterically as a mild inside joke in superior friend groups or in the crack-addicted Breaking Bad community. For instance, when your friend is dead asleep at 3 AM you may scare the life out of them by yelling the three magic words in intermittent order. Doing this after having set their house on fire enhances the experience. As a diehard Breaking Bad fan, it is unlikely that they will be upset at you for committing arson.
There are 27 three-word sentences in which you can yell any of these three words, but the most common are:
• "Jesse Wake Up."
• "Wake Up Jesse."
• "Jesse Jesse Jesse."
Some contemporary parents name their child -- or sometimes all of their children -- "Jesse" so that they can traumatise them with "JESSE WAKE UP!" every morning of their lives. Conveniently, the name is unisexual.
"Jesse. JESSE. JESSE! JESSE WAKE UP!"
"Mmmuhhh-wwhat?"
"The group assignment was due yesterday night Jesse!"
"Jesse. JESSE. JESSE! JESSE WAKE UP!"
"Mmmuhhh-wwhat?"
"The Barbie movie Jesse! THE BARBIE MOVIE IS IN CINEMAS JESSE!"
"Jesse. JESSE. JESSE! JESSE WAKE UP!"
"Mmmuhhh-wwhat?"
"We need to hit the gym Jesse!"
"Jesse. JESSE. JESSE! JESSE WAKE UP!"
"Mmmuhhh-wwhat?"
"JESUS Jesse! Jesus died for our sins Jesse!"
"Jesse. JESSE. JESSE! JESSE WAKE UP!"
"Mmmuhhh-wwhat?"
"It's sunrise Jesse! We didn't eat before the fast Jesse!"
"Jesse. JESSE. JESSE! JESSE WAKE UP!"
"Mmmuhhh-wwhat?"
"Kanye Jesse! Kanye tweeted something Jesse!"
"Jesse. JESSE. JESSE! JESSE WAKE UP!"
"Mmmuhhh-wwhat?"
"We slept through the entire Flash movie Jessie!"
"Jesse. JESSE. JESSE! JESSE WAKE UP!"
"Mmmuhhh-wwhat?"
"My mum said we can have a sleepover Jesse! SHE SAID YES JESSE!"
"Jesse. JESSE. JESSE! JESSE WAKE UP!"
"Mmmuhhh-wwhat?"
"Maccas Jesse! Maccas has a new sundae flavour Jesse!"
"Jesse. JESSE. JESSE! JESSE WAKE UP!"
"Mmmuhhh-wwhat?"
"Santa Claus Jesse! SANTA IS A BLACK JEW JESSE!"
"Jesse. JESSE. JESSE! JESSE WAKE UP!"
"Mmmuhhh-wwhat?"
"My memory Jesse! I HAVE MEMORY LOSS JESSE!"
"Jesse. JESSE. JESSE! JESSE WAKE UP!"
"Mmmuhhh-wwhat?"
"My mum Jesse! She told me to wash the dishes Jesse! I FORGOT TO WASH THE DISHES JESSE!"
"Jesse. JESSE. JESSE! JESSE WAKE UP!"
"Mmmuhhh-wwhat?"
"My memory Jesse! I HAVE MEMORY LOSS JESSE!"
"Mmmuhhh-wwhat?"
"The group assignment was due yesterday night Jesse!"
"Jesse. JESSE. JESSE! JESSE WAKE UP!"
"Mmmuhhh-wwhat?"
"The Barbie movie Jesse! THE BARBIE MOVIE IS IN CINEMAS JESSE!"
"Jesse. JESSE. JESSE! JESSE WAKE UP!"
"Mmmuhhh-wwhat?"
"We need to hit the gym Jesse!"
"Jesse. JESSE. JESSE! JESSE WAKE UP!"
"Mmmuhhh-wwhat?"
"JESUS Jesse! Jesus died for our sins Jesse!"
"Jesse. JESSE. JESSE! JESSE WAKE UP!"
"Mmmuhhh-wwhat?"
"It's sunrise Jesse! We didn't eat before the fast Jesse!"
"Jesse. JESSE. JESSE! JESSE WAKE UP!"
"Mmmuhhh-wwhat?"
"Kanye Jesse! Kanye tweeted something Jesse!"
"Jesse. JESSE. JESSE! JESSE WAKE UP!"
"Mmmuhhh-wwhat?"
"We slept through the entire Flash movie Jessie!"
"Jesse. JESSE. JESSE! JESSE WAKE UP!"
"Mmmuhhh-wwhat?"
"My mum said we can have a sleepover Jesse! SHE SAID YES JESSE!"
"Jesse. JESSE. JESSE! JESSE WAKE UP!"
"Mmmuhhh-wwhat?"
"Maccas Jesse! Maccas has a new sundae flavour Jesse!"
"Jesse. JESSE. JESSE! JESSE WAKE UP!"
"Mmmuhhh-wwhat?"
"Santa Claus Jesse! SANTA IS A BLACK JEW JESSE!"
"Jesse. JESSE. JESSE! JESSE WAKE UP!"
"Mmmuhhh-wwhat?"
"My memory Jesse! I HAVE MEMORY LOSS JESSE!"
"Jesse. JESSE. JESSE! JESSE WAKE UP!"
"Mmmuhhh-wwhat?"
"My mum Jesse! She told me to wash the dishes Jesse! I FORGOT TO WASH THE DISHES JESSE!"
"Jesse. JESSE. JESSE! JESSE WAKE UP!"
"Mmmuhhh-wwhat?"
"My memory Jesse! I HAVE MEMORY LOSS JESSE!"
by bradleysheadissick July 15, 2023
Oh where to start with Maryama...
If you ever encounter a Maryama, you will quickly notice her unwavering kindness and the snow-white purity of her soul. This is accompanied by a beautiful face with the symmetry of a butterfly, the detail of a Renaissance painting, and the tantalizing allure of a single crimson rose nestled in a bed of greenery. Her hair is a delicate shower that germinates the mind's fantasies. Her voice is a cool breeze on a hot summer evening. Her touch, a frosty warm tide that squeezes and tugs at the heart's strings. Her presence is akin to the endearing heat of sunlight piercing the curtain of the heart. And her eyes. Her eyes are glistening archways into the wonders of her mind. Her mind is smart, funny, attentive, whimsical and amusing and curious like a toddler. Like a toddler, she embraces you in her arms and lullabies you to sleep. Asleep, you hope that her divine spirit dances into your dream. Your dreams will come true with a Maryama.
And if you ever get one,
You won't know where to start with a Maryama...
If you ever encounter a Maryama, you will quickly notice her unwavering kindness and the snow-white purity of her soul. This is accompanied by a beautiful face with the symmetry of a butterfly, the detail of a Renaissance painting, and the tantalizing allure of a single crimson rose nestled in a bed of greenery. Her hair is a delicate shower that germinates the mind's fantasies. Her voice is a cool breeze on a hot summer evening. Her touch, a frosty warm tide that squeezes and tugs at the heart's strings. Her presence is akin to the endearing heat of sunlight piercing the curtain of the heart. And her eyes. Her eyes are glistening archways into the wonders of her mind. Her mind is smart, funny, attentive, whimsical and amusing and curious like a toddler. Like a toddler, she embraces you in her arms and lullabies you to sleep. Asleep, you hope that her divine spirit dances into your dream. Your dreams will come true with a Maryama.
And if you ever get one,
You won't know where to start with a Maryama...
"Yooo! Is that Maryama?"
"Yeah. Can't you tell?"
"Wow, she's like the Mona Lisa."
"Yeah. Yeah, she is."
"Yeah. Can't you tell?"
"Wow, she's like the Mona Lisa."
"Yeah. Yeah, she is."
by bradleysheadissick July 13, 2023
Arya is the most gorgeous, beautiful, kindest, and caring soul you will ever come across. If you are lucky enough to have your paths intertwine and become friends, you will finally know that you have made it in life. And if you are lucky enough to get to say that you have an Arya as your best friend, you will wonder how you ever even went 19 years without one. Once you finally meet an Arya you will feel as though you have seen 'daylight'; and the 'Mona Lisa' will never be able to compare because an Arya could be the Mona Lisa, if the Mona Lisa had a prettier face. An Arya is like a mansion with a view. Sometimes you will wish you never met an Arya, because then you would be able to live peacefully not knowing that an Arya exists in the world.
"Yo is that you bestie Arya?"
"Yea, who else would it be?"
"Arya is hella cool I wish I had a best friend like him"
"Yea he really is"
"Yea, who else would it be?"
"Arya is hella cool I wish I had a best friend like him"
"Yea he really is"
by bradleysheadissick September 2, 2023
No seriously. This is a reference to Breaking Bad season 1 episode 4, when Walter Junior, upset and in turmoil over his father's lung cancer diagnosis, outrages at his farther's hopelessness. His mother, Skyler White, is visibly distraught and in shock. Walter White, his father, is facially ambiguous, but I suggest that he is turned on by the unexpected lash out. The abruptness and out-of-pocketness makes this one of the funniest lines in Breaking Bad, nay, in American television.
The writers could well have ended the entire TV show by having Walter White die right then and there and rolling the credits. In fact, this would have been a totally viable ending to a long-winded story and would have prevented the rise of the crack-addicted, mentally unstable Breaking Bad community. Just imagine a world free from crack-heads yelling "JESSE WAKE UP" in public.
The phrase is most often unintentionally used by rage-quitting gamers; specifically, Minecraft zealots when they have two hearts, no shield, and three skeletons are raping them. The phrase also features in many political debates when the opposition runs out of rebuttals and resorts to crude insults, because, after all, this is the best way to assert yourself in discourse.
The writers could well have ended the entire TV show by having Walter White die right then and there and rolling the credits. In fact, this would have been a totally viable ending to a long-winded story and would have prevented the rise of the crack-addicted, mentally unstable Breaking Bad community. Just imagine a world free from crack-heads yelling "JESSE WAKE UP" in public.
The phrase is most often unintentionally used by rage-quitting gamers; specifically, Minecraft zealots when they have two hearts, no shield, and three skeletons are raping them. The phrase also features in many political debates when the opposition runs out of rebuttals and resorts to crude insults, because, after all, this is the best way to assert yourself in discourse.
*3000-word assignment exists*
Professor: "You already have a lenient 5-day period to complete the short-release assignment. However, given the astounding number of simple extensions, we have decided to provide a 2-day blanket extension."
Students: "Why don't you just fucking die already?"
You: *empty a Vietnamese War amount of bug spray on a cockroach*
Cockroach: *moves*
You: "Why don't you just fucking die already?"
Osama bin Laden: *becomes the most elusive terrorist leader in history*
Americans: "Why don't you just fucking die already?"
Stranger approaching you with a clipboard and optimism: "How do you feel ab-"
You: "Why don't you just fucking die already?"
*waiter places your food in front of you*
Waiter: "Enjoy!"
You: *accidentally* "You too."
Waiter: *eats your food*
You: "Why don't you just fucking die already?"
Professor: "You already have a lenient 5-day period to complete the short-release assignment. However, given the astounding number of simple extensions, we have decided to provide a 2-day blanket extension."
Students: "Why don't you just fucking die already?"
You: *empty a Vietnamese War amount of bug spray on a cockroach*
Cockroach: *moves*
You: "Why don't you just fucking die already?"
Osama bin Laden: *becomes the most elusive terrorist leader in history*
Americans: "Why don't you just fucking die already?"
Stranger approaching you with a clipboard and optimism: "How do you feel ab-"
You: "Why don't you just fucking die already?"
*waiter places your food in front of you*
Waiter: "Enjoy!"
You: *accidentally* "You too."
Waiter: *eats your food*
You: "Why don't you just fucking die already?"
by bradleysheadissick July 18, 2023
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"shx dschbvdshjc Frog"
"Frog dsjcbs dschjbs jhscjsd!"
"sxnsjs Frog dkscjkds eifufy"
"Frog dsjcbs dschjbs jhscjsd!"
"sxnsjs Frog dkscjkds eifufy"
by bradleysheadissick September 20, 2023
The ultimate food option at Subway, specifically a subway footlong (S) and a subway cookie (C). The slang is Australian and is thought to have originated from crackheads at the University of Sydney. Regardless, it is a killer combination that offers the right amount of healthy and unhealthy, vegetables and processed sugar, crystal meth and crack cocaine.
Friend 1: "I'm all out of crystal meth!"
Friend 2: "It's alright, we'll get S&C while we wait for Jesse to come by with a new batch."
Friend 2: "It's alright, we'll get S&C while we wait for Jesse to come by with a new batch."
by bradleysheadissick August 21, 2023
Seemingly a simple marketing slogan used by all civil and criminal solicitors, this famous line is actually from Breaking Bad season 2 episode 8. It makes a hilarious appearance in Saul Goodman's television advertisement:
"Hi I'm Saul Goodman. Did you know you have rights? Constitution says you do. And so do I."
It is most commonly used amongst members of the unofficial, imaginary, crack-addicted breaking bad community that every zealous Breaking Bad viewer thinks they are uniquely apart of. The phrase is also the reason that many aspiring students have mistakenly entered the legal profession and incompetently represented and let down innocent people to the blood-thirsty prosecutors.
"Hi I'm Saul Goodman. Did you know you have rights? Constitution says you do. And so do I."
It is most commonly used amongst members of the unofficial, imaginary, crack-addicted breaking bad community that every zealous Breaking Bad viewer thinks they are uniquely apart of. The phrase is also the reason that many aspiring students have mistakenly entered the legal profession and incompetently represented and let down innocent people to the blood-thirsty prosecutors.
Friend 1: "This Subway is so terrible they never properly wrap my sandwich, it's literally at risk of falling apart."
Friend 2: "Did you know you have rights?"
Friend 1: "Constitution says you do."
Both friends: "And so do I."
*Friend 1 has just been convicted of gross negligence manslaughter after jokingly pushing their best friend down steep stairs and causing their death. They are in court awaiting sentencing by the judge.*
Friend 1: *anxious and regretful* "I didn't mean to. I can't believe I did that man. I-I-I ca-can't bel-"
Friend 2: "Calm down. Calm down! Did you know you have rights!?"
*Judge looks up in confusion*
Friend 1: *wipes tears from eyes and sniffles* "Constitution says you do!"
Judge: *slams gavel* "Order please!"
Both friends together: "AND SO DO I!"
Friend 2: "Did you know you have rights?"
Friend 1: "Constitution says you do."
Both friends: "And so do I."
*Friend 1 has just been convicted of gross negligence manslaughter after jokingly pushing their best friend down steep stairs and causing their death. They are in court awaiting sentencing by the judge.*
Friend 1: *anxious and regretful* "I didn't mean to. I can't believe I did that man. I-I-I ca-can't bel-"
Friend 2: "Calm down. Calm down! Did you know you have rights!?"
*Judge looks up in confusion*
Friend 1: *wipes tears from eyes and sniffles* "Constitution says you do!"
Judge: *slams gavel* "Order please!"
Both friends together: "AND SO DO I!"
by bradleysheadissick August 17, 2023