8 definitions by austingale

Top Definition
to sit on a bus stop bench and tell complete strangers your life story and then ejaculate all over their face
when she sat down beside him, the homeless man proceeded to crank that forrest gump
by austingale March 08, 2008
when your husband is the center of a scandal where he ejaculates all over a girls face, and you stand by your man. you then run for president 10 years later.
that bitch was all mad at me at first for doin a crank that hillary, but she eventually got over it
by austingale March 17, 2008
when your with a girl and jizz in your hand and rub it on the girl's forehead in the shape of a cross and make her wear it all day, for jesus
i went to church and the priest did a crank that ash wednesday on me
by austingale March 08, 2008
when you go hunting with your friend and you ejaculare all over their face
i'm gonna crank that dick cheney with tom
by austingale March 08, 2008
when you're on a flight and you see a girl who is sleeping with an empty seat next to her, you slide in next to her and start masturbating and ejaculate in her hair. she will file a $200,000 lawsuit against the airline.
i did a crank that flight 2074 on dis chick and now american airlines has to pay out 200k
by austingale March 16, 2008
when your with a girl and your about to cum, you stick a carrot up her ass and say "what's up doc?" and then ejaculate all over her face
i was with this girl last night and i finally got to crank that bugs bunny
by austingale March 08, 2008
ejaculate in a chick's mouth so that they puff up with jizz, then hit her cheeks with your cock (aka the sledge-o-matic) so that it sprays all over. caution: first row audience may get wet
i was in the first row of the crank that gallagher last night and i didn't have a raincoat
by austingale March 08, 2008

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