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argonak's definitions

backdoor sledgehammer

This can mean many things, all of which are (as the name implies) destructive to the recipient's anal opening.

Noun: Something which is used to inflict massive anal damage (broomhandle, monster dildo, armadillo, shoe, etc.)
Noun: The actual technique of using a tool (as described above) to pound the victim's anal opening into submission.
"After being tied down to prevent escape, the man was given a thorough backdoor sledgehammer."

"I will use this lampshade as a backdoor sledgehammer if you come near my house again."
by Argonak October 11, 2008
mugGet the backdoor sledgehammermug.

Heretic's Fork

noun:

A medieval torture device which consisted of a two-sided fork which would be strapped to the victims neck so that any movement of the jaw caused extreme pain.

The victim was then forced to say the word "abiuro" which is latin for "I recant" or else they were hung or burned at the stake.

This device qualifies as a funkatron.
Tom: "I don't really think that god exists..."

Bill: "STFU or Im gonna tell the pope and he will strap a Heretic's Fork to your neck!"

Tom: "..."
by Argonak April 12, 2008
mugGet the Heretic's Forkmug.

Thumbscrew

noun:
A torture device of many forms and shapes. The main purpose it serves is to inflict slow and excrutiating pain to the fingers or toes of a victim.

verb:
A sexual technique involving the thumb (or both thumbs) to screw or fuck their partner or victim. Usually performed in the "thumbs up" or "handshake" position.
1: After the thumbscrew was applied to the cookie monster, he confessed to taking all my cookies.

2: "If you insert your thumb in an orfice then you are thumbscrewing."
by Argonak April 12, 2008
mugGet the Thumbscrewmug.

crepe rape

1. Rape using a crepe.
2. French rape.
3. Rape in a "fancy" way.
1."If you don't shut up right now I will shove this crepe up your ass!"

"Crepe rape!"

2. The frenchman proceded to pounce on his victim as the young boy cried out in dismay, "Crepe rape!".

3. As he spread caviar across my body, all I could mutter through my silk gag was "Crepe rape...!"
by Argonak October 16, 2008
mugGet the crepe rapemug.

poundatron

A robotic device (sometimes, but not always of a sexual nature) which pounds.

While officialy of a robotic nature, it is often used to describe anything that pounds, whether it is of organic or synthetic build.
"A jackhammer is a poundatron." -Synthetic example.

"A was a destructive poundatron last night." -Organic example.

"The city was pounded into rubble by the massive poundatron." -Bonus example.
by Argonak October 11, 2008
mugGet the poundatronmug.

Judas Chair

This torture device, also known as the Judas Cradle, was implimented often by the Spanish Inquisition.

The victim was hoisted up by a rope and forced to sit on top of a pyramid shaped device, thereby causing rectal trauma of several kinds.
I heard that homosexuals find the Judas Chair quite pleasurefull...
by Argonak April 12, 2008
mugGet the Judas Chairmug.

kameo

Kameo is a game by development team Rare for the Xbox 360. This game has you take the role of a fairy who can transform into several different grotesque creatures.

Even though this game is sick and perverse in nature, there is something disturbing about it that keeps its players coming back for more.
"I don't want to play Kameo." - Travis

"You have no choice." - Rodion
by Argonak April 11, 2008
mugGet the kameomug.

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