61 definitions by Yopmail User

To pour six cans of paint on your head (each of them representing colors on an actual Rubik's Cube), which you penetrate your girlfriend's ass and vagina with (either order is fine) while ramming it as far up as possible and violently nodding during both processes for maximum pleasure. Consent is not required.
That kid's vagina smelled great during that Rubik's Cube. Her ass was not so beautiful.
by Yopmail User April 12, 2023
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To perform this sex act, you need to gather the vomit, shit, saliva, and cum/vaginal fluids of ten kindergarteners whose birthdays fall on January/September 1st, as well as your own. Pour them in a blender and let the mixture blend for thirty minutes. After it's finished, make a human centipede out of the kindergarteners with a staplegun, feed the mixture and some laxatives to the first kid, and quickly staple his anus to the last kid's mouth to finish the cycle of gurgling and shitting. It should be noted that the kids will try to break free, so it won't hurt to glue their limbs to the floor. After an hour, break the link between the first and last kid, give the first kid Diet Coke and Mentos up the ass, and quickly staple his ass to the last kid's mouth. Finish the act by beating off on each kid's face.
New Years is every politician's favorite sex act.
by Yopmail User January 8, 2023
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The fear of the fear of getting a boner while thinking about being touched and watched by a fat duck while simultaneously sleeping, driving, publicly speaking, cooking, and dreaming.
How the fuck can I provide an example for phallophronemohypnoglossovehomageiricoanatidaeobesoaphenphosmoneirophobophobia when absolutely no one in the world has it?
by Yopmail User August 25, 2022
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A day for naughty kids to arm themselves with Nerf guns, marking their futile declaration of war against Santa and the North Pole. Always occurs on December 26th.
Declare War on the North Pole Day 2022
Naughty kid 1: I-I-I saw it in F-Fortnite! I-if we enter through the front door we will kill the elves and s-s-seize the means of production!
Rest of the naughty kids: H-HEIL... C-C-COMMUNISM!! PRAISE STALIN AND FORTNITE!!
Santa Claus: *exits workshop* The fuck is this shit?
Naughty kids: FORTNITE BATTLE PASS PLZZZZ!!! FOLLOW MY TIKTO-
*Santa guns them all down with an AR-15*
by Yopmail User February 23, 2023
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The act of ramming a girl up the ass with Diet Coke and Mentos while covering your dick in cheese (smegma is acceptable) and ramming it down her throat, whether she likes it or not. This is then followed by shoving the bottle of Diet Coke in her vagina and making a bunch of funny faces while spitting some cum in her mouth and is finished by shoving the bottle of Diet Coke in her mouth while railing her anally.
by Yopmail User July 4, 2023
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To use your cum, shit, piss, and vomit to stuff a turducken and shove a teen girl's head up said turducken. You must then use scissors to cut her shirt up. Then, you take her pants off, remove her bra and panties, and ready a bottle of Diet Coke and Mentos to shove up her vagina and anus. When you pour Diet Coke and Mentos down her vagina and anus, you must suck her boobs slowly and softly while pissing in her vagina. You're then gonna need to grab a whip (if you haven't already) and command the girl to kneel and dig in while you ride on her back as if she were a horse. When she finishes, pour the leftovers in a blender, pour the mixture in the girl's mouth, and make out with her, in that order. Swallow afterwards.
Don't question the cum, shit, and vomit on the floor and dinner table. I just wished her "a happy Thanksgiving."
by Yopmail User November 13, 2022
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This is when two or more males engage in mutual masturbation, then dock each other just before they ejaculate. The docking must last as long as it takes for the cum to harden on both of their dicks. After that, they must attempt to separate the heads of their dicks in the most painful ways possible.
I used to be a pariah like you until I Richard Nixoned 78 thirteen-year-old boys.
by Yopmail User April 12, 2023
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