Virgin Suicides's definitions

landscraper

ugly, one-story building(s) that takes up one whole city block (or more) by sprawling out horizontally instead of vertically, like traditional skyscrapers.

Man, that glass and steel filing cabinet of a building that the county government has been using for years - that thing is a damn landscraper !

by Virgin Suicides June 25, 2017

tit shop

the clinic for plastic surgeons specializing in breast enhancement procedures.

Gina : say Carla, I'm feeling a bit flat in the chest area, let's go to the tit shop and buy us some boobs !
Carla: Great ! I hear they're having a special this month, too ' buy two boobs, get a third free'. Guess that's just in case one deflates or falls off or something.

Gina : Awesome !

by Virgin Suicides April 23, 2017

fascism

simply put, when capitalism gets MEAN.

Untold numbers of african-american communities have been decimated by government-ordered imprisonment of their largely male populations; low wage McDonald's and Walmart service jobs have been touted as reputable career options for some time now; the national economy is officially at full capacity despite millions of current unemployed and underemployed workers; the president says he openly admires the Russian prime minister and the way he manages its' kleptocratic economic and political systems; the 1% vs. the 99%. This is fascism.

by Virgin Suicides April 21, 2017

the mysteriously vanishing 40-year old actress

The worst kept secret in American entertainment - be it film, stage or television : be a woman, be an actor and turn 40 years old, and your career is effectively over. You're done.

The American actress Hilary Swank a few years back played the lead in a film called 'Amelia', a biopic about Amelia Earhart. Earhart, for those of you who may not recall, was a famous early 20th century American female aviator who, at the age of 40, mysteriously disappeared and was never seen again. Ever. Which, when you think about it, is right up Hollywood's alley because if you're an actress and you're in Tinseltown and you turn 40, you disappear, too. Never seen again. Never. Ever. The mysteriously vanishing 40-year old actress.

by Virgin Suicides November 5, 2017

guy's heaven

beer, farts and boobs - not necessarily in that order.

There I was ... all slobbed out : sitting on my fat ass, drinking beer, blasting huge farts and watching scantily clad women walk by with all of their huge, pendulous cleavage hanging out. And I thought 'is this Iowa ?' (Field Of Dreams Homage). No, it's heaven. Guy's heaven.

by Virgin Suicides October 27, 2017

I Love You, Man

phrase that two grown men can exchange as a sign of mutual admiration, confidence, loyalty and trustworthiness without any implication of erotic or sexual attraction.

From the popular podcast S-Town :

John B. McLemore : I love you, man.
Tyler Goodson : I know that. I love you too, John B.
John B. : And just because I say that, Tyler, doesn't mean I'm trying to get up your butt !
Tyler : I know that, John B. You've been like a second father to me.

(Months later, after John B.'s suicide) :

Tyler : Poor John B. Man, I miss that fucker ...

If S-Town is essentially correct, I think a lot of people miss John B. We all love you, John B. And miss you.

by Virgin Suicides July 27, 2017

15 minutes

about the time required these days when passing from one celebrity and corresponding fad to another, anyway one can achieve it.

Celebrity 1 : I was the 'it' girl in southwest Tanzania way back in 1979 !
Celebrity 2 : I was short listed for a Golden Globe for Best Sound Check Edit way back in 1985 !
Celebrity 3 : I was photographed with Cameron Crowe in 1996 - wayyyyy before he made 'Almost Famous'
Me : Really ? And I'm Gwyneth Paltrow's 49th cousin 117 times removed - on her great, great uncle's side - for anyone who's counting. Guess we all try for our 15 minutes anyway we can get them. LOL

by Virgin Suicides May 20, 2017