Definitions by Turdmeister69

Message Lady 

She is the greatest writer of our time. Her latest speech had me in tears. It goes like this:

"At the tone, please record your message. When you've finished recording, you may hang up or press one for more options. To leave a call-back number, press five. *Boop*"

-The Message Lady

Man, the Message Lady sure is great.

Isn't she, though?

Message Lady by Turdmeister69 April 1, 2020

Hogan Man-Dildo 

A nice kid, but can be kinda annoying. He's a little bit of a control freak and is hard to take seriously because of his height. Still a good friend.

Oh... that kid's kind of a Hogan.

A Hogan Man-Dildo?

Yeah...

Hogan Man-Dildo by Turdmeister69 April 1, 2020

New Word 

Something that 1 and a half-year-olds say every day, but no one is smart enough to document them or assign meaning.

Wow, did Billy just say a New Word?

Yeah, it sounded like, "gibpherligh"

New Word by Turdmeister69 April 1, 2020

Floss 

A tool for maintaining good oral hygiene. Also, 9-year-olds still obsessed with Fortnite have used it to get on their parents nerves when asked to perform the everyday dental procedure.

Wow, that kid was actually flossing his teeth? They mostly floss their freaking legs nowadays.

Floss by Turdmeister69 April 1, 2020

Beard, Itchy Beard 

Ways of saying, naaahh, that's fake or NAAAAHHH, that's HELLA fake.

Bob: Yo, I saw a flying saucer!

Steve: Beard!

Bob: No, dude, it was real and it had a bunch of guinea pigs falling out of it!

Steve: Itchy Beard!!!

Beard, Itchy Beard!

Beard, Itchy Beard by Turdmeister69 March 16, 2020

Mrs. Spiders 

A demon. There's no other way of putting it. Her favorite saying is "NO FUN ALLOWED!" and she doesn't seem to be human. No sense of humor, and - actually, I think she's an enderman. She just appears behind you.

AAHHH! It's Mrs. Spiders!!!

Mrs. Spiders by Turdmeister69 March 15, 2020

Blocked 

Something that happens to you if you're an asshole in a group chat. Also, this is what the public schools do to any page that is not educational.

Kid #1: Oh, did you see what the schools did to Urban Dictionary?

Kid #2: Yeah, they blocked it. So sad...

Blocked by Turdmeister69 March 1, 2020