10 definitions by The Poison Dwarf

Used in irony, a derogatory term that can be used to cause a seemingly fit individual to question their own set of hitherto confirmed values and beliefs without proper cause. Extreme caution should be exercised; the greeting ought not to be used on a regular basis as repeated reminders might leading to eating disorders or bouts of over exercise, leading to unwanted side effects, such as hair loss, saddle rash, jogger's nipple or a fetish for wearing padded lycra clothing and ultimately self abuse.
I greeted Neddy this morning using the term 'Phatbloke' as a form of informal address. Unfortunaly however, it appears to have caused him to be consumed by guilt and loss of self-esteem. As a consequence he's left work early to go for a swim and a bike ride. I fear that he will truly and totally fuck himself severely and now am remorseful for my careless and frivolous actions.
by The Poison Dwarf August 04, 2010
A genial expression of close affilliation best expressed by unexpectedly tapping a friend, relative or associate in the genital region, with the back of one's hand - usually with the intent of causing either mild temporary discomfort or pain. However, this can escalate over a period of time into a situation in which the 'nobtap' might be performed at the most inconvenient or inopportune moment, with the intention of causing maximum embarassment. Any affected response (or rather lack of one) from the tappee might be insinuated as reflecting their prowess or endurance, causing even greater anxiety for the tapper in the form of reciprocal events yet to come.
That little fuck Simon nobtapped me in the jewels when I was on the phone, really made my eyes water. I'd have twatted him right back but I fear that he enjoys any form of bodily contact, no matter how perverse.....
by The Poison Dwarf July 10, 2010
in this context, used to describe the inane and vacant expression sometimes appearing upon an individual's countenance, suggesting that they are unable to focus or concentrate on current events owing to a preoccupation or pervious misdemeanour involving some form of deviant activity
Andrew, you've gone all Soapy Tit Wank again; will you please just get a grip, a life and a proper haircut, or just fuck off home, will you?
by The Poison Dwarf July 15, 2010

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