The Colonel's definitions

Boxtrap

A gay man's beard.

The belief is that the attraction of beards within the gay community is actually a latent heterosexual attraction to the female genitalia. Hence, the man's mouth become a surrogate vagina...hair and all.

Related words:
"box" - slang for vagina.
"trap" - slang for mouth.

After Bob came out of the closet, the first thing he did was buy a white Miata and grow a boxtrap.

by The Colonel May 19, 2006

rig

To have relations (of a sexual nature) with a woman.

Dude, see that hot blonde chick? I rigged her last night.

by The Colonel July 18, 2003

clag

Unidentifiable substance, usually of a secreted, bodily fluid type nature. Australian version of "shmegma".

Dude, I've gotta change my shirt...I just noticed that there's clag all over it.

by The Colonel July 18, 2003

culinary colonialism

the act of going to another country and telling them how to make their ethnic food

Hey Slim, people in mexico have no idea how to make a chalupa, so I used some culinary colonialism to show them where to put the baja sauce.

by The Colonel December 2, 2003

roust

To heckle in a public setting.

Dude, let's go sit on the corner and roust all the kooks who walk by.

by The Colonel July 18, 2003

Bad Hop

A baseball hit on the ground that takes an unexpected, usually sharp bounce upwards.

While any unexpected movement can be considered a bad hop - off to the side or even some unusual spin on the ball - most bad hops "leap up" suddenly just before reaching the player attempting to field it.

The negative ("bad") nature of the term refers to its difficulty to catch (inherent in catching a ball is successfully being able to predict the ball's exact path or trajectory).

Not only are balls which take a bad hop hard to catch, they are often dangerous and can hit a player in the face or upper body.

Bad hops can be caused by dry or wet spots on the grass or dirt, small rocks or weed clumps, or even tiny imperfections or divits on the surface of the ground.

It looked like a routine play, but the ball took a bad hop off the edge of the grass and hit the shortshop in the eye.

by The Colonel October 29, 2007

rat-hole

To digress in an extensive way. To divert the conversation to a topic that is not only unrelated to the topic at hand, but a topic that will likely have no immediate resolution either.

That's an interesting discussion, but let's stay on track and not go down a rat-hole.

by The Colonel July 18, 2003