2 definitions by TerribleTom

Top Definition
The University of Toronto (U of T) is a large research oriented school located in Toronto, Ontario, Canada.

U of T prides itself on being the most academically intensive school in the country and, generally speaking, they are correct. Unfortunately, everything else about the university sucks.

Despite what U of T students and faculty may tell you, it is NOT the "Harvard of the North," that distinction goes to Mcgill. (sorry Queen's)

The admissions averages are lower than that of "easier" schools such as UWO, Queen's, and Mcgill because no one wants to go there. There is no student community, and no social scene. The student body is VERY unattractive, and most are virgins when they graduate.

Speaking of graduates, the ones U of T produces are pathetic: they have zero real world skills, and despite their "VASTLY SUPERIOR EDUCATION!!!!!," are unable to find jobs; that is until some enterprising Waterloo alum realizes that U of T graduates make excellent code monkeys if kept locked in a back room and fed a steady diet of study drugs and U of T alumni newsletters.

If you want to become a businessman, go to Western. If you want to become a doctor, go to Mcgill. If you want to become a lawyer, go to Queen's. If you want to become an insecure, friendless, virgin loser, who will forever cling to the security blanket known as "prestige," go to the University of Toronto; if that's your goal, there truly is no better school anywhere in Canada or the world.
Western grad: I went to UWO. I slept with 25 new women each year, I played on the football team, I partied my ass off, and now I make 125k a year as a investment banker.

Queen's grad: I went to Queen's. I killed it in undergrad and I met my wife in law school. Together we started our own law firm and are now happily married with 2 kids and a black lab.

Mcgill grad: I went to Mcgill. During school I tore up the nightclubs in Montreal, the coolest city in Canada and one of the best in the world. I graduated summa cum laude, went to medical school, and now I save lives for a living.

University of Toronto grad: Yeah well I went to U of T, the BEST school in the country. During school I stayed home every weekend, studied my ass off, and still graduated with a 2.7 GPA. I met no girls, went to no parties, and couldn't get into graduate school. Today I'm a personal accountant for a Banker, a Lawyer, and a Doctor.
by TerribleTom August 08, 2010
The act of intentionally restricting oxygen while masturbating in order to achieve a more powerful orgasm than manual stimulation alone.

Choking yourself while jerking off/flicking the bean.
Male 1: Dude last night I was asphyxibating and I passed out.
Male 2: Me too man! Asphyxibation is the new sex!
by TerribleTom January 18, 2011

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