6 definitions by Tee-bag

Top Definition
A sudden misfortune, mishap or fiasco caused by text messaging at an inappropriate moment, ie. while walking or driving.
I was text messaging on my way to the movie and nearly walked into a pole. It was almost a total textastrophe.
by Tee-bag May 24, 2008
When a girl is laying on her back and a guy squats over her face, laying one testicle in each eye socket and his penis along the shaft of her nose, acting as a shield.
It was really sunny when we were fooling around on the beach, so out of the kindness of my heart I gave her a pair of egyptian sunglasses.
by Tee-bag May 16, 2009
The capacity or power of a person to convince you to go to the gym, or more commonly to crap out and not go.
We joined the gym together, but it turns out she's a bad gymfluence and we never go.

She told me she'd rather go for a drink than go to the gym. She's such a bad gymfluence.
by Tee-bag May 23, 2008
The person at your office who is responsible for coordinating courier deliveries.
I don't know, ask Lorna. She's the FedExpert.
by Tee-bag June 17, 2008
An individual who, while engaged in foreplay, has the ability to give focused attention to more than one breast at a time.
Oh yeah, the sex was fantastic. He's quite the multit-tasker.
by Tee-bag July 03, 2008
Any automobile used to transport you to, or from a location, that is driven by your mother. The trip is usually accompanied by some mild embarrassment.
I was a little embarrassed when I was dropped off at the wedding in my limomsine.
by Tee-bag July 23, 2008

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