Shreve Lamb and Harmon's definitions

arse

The original variant of the vulgar word "ass" in American English.

Etymology:

Until the Victorian period, "ass" had no profane meaning and simply referred to what we now call the donkey. Because of the increasingly non-rhotic nature of standard British English, "arse" was often rendered "ass". The age of Victorian propriety resulted in the rechristening of the horse-like animal, changing the name to "donkey" to avoid any improper inferences. This usage was also adopted in America, which is why the word "arse" is not usually used in the United States. Some people in Britain have adopted the American version in writing. Although before World War I they were similar, the British pronunciations of "ass" (IPA /æs/) and "arse" (IPA /α:s/) are now quite different.

Source: Wikipedia.

Sorry, but "ass" just sounds more pleasantly vulgar.

Linguistic elitist Briton arses, like the ones on this definition, are known for their pathetic uses of etymology to try and insult the intellect of Americans and -- in this particular case -- Canadians.

by Shreve Lamb and Harmon February 4, 2007

gay marriage

A matrimonial union between two people of the same sex. Not a mockery of marriage because it implies a loving relationship between — and listen to these words closely — TWO. CONSENTING. ADULTS. If you honestly think that the next step is going to be bigamy, beastiality, or pedophilia, then you're really off your rocker because none of these things involve all three of those three words. Maybe you can make a case for incest, but that's more often practiced in the Bible Belt between straight people, anyway.

Ironically, the American state with the lowest divorce rate is Massachusetts, the center of gay marriage land; followed by Connecticut, New Jersey, Rhode Island, and New York. The American state with the highest divorce rate? Nevada, with Oklahoma, Tennessee, Wyoming and Indiana rounding out the bottom five.

That's right, the holier-than-thou Bible Belt has the highest divorce rates in the country, while the liberal Northeast has the lowest. Suck it dry, neocons.

by Shreve Lamb and Harmon February 4, 2007

blue states

A euphemism for Democratic-voting states in the 2004 election, particularly in reference to the Northeast and West Coast.

Ironically, these states also have:

A) Most of the lowest crime rates in the nation.
B) The lowest divorce rates in the nation.
C) The highest quality of life in the nation.
D) The lowest ratio of federal aid to tax dollars paid in the nation.

The "blue states" may have their faults, but they outstrip the "red states" by most accounts.

by Shreve Lamb and Harmon February 4, 2007

New York City

Colloquialism for the city of New York, most often used in those occasions where the metropolis must be distinguished from the rest of the state. However, does not exist as an official, political entity; the official name of the city IS, indeed, just the City of New York. For instance, Kansas City is officially the City of Kansas City, but New York is not officially the City of New York City.

There is actually no such thing as New York City; that's not the official name. There is, however, such thing as the City of New York.

Source: Wikipedia.

by Shreve Lamb and Harmon February 4, 2007

cancan

A style of chorus line dance that has its origins in the Montparnasse area of Paris in the 1830s. Most popularly depicted as a chorus line of beautiful women in frilly, suggestive costume circa 1890 doing impossibly high kicks in unison, in addition to moves like the ronde de jambe and flirtatious manipulation of the skirt. This latter is particularly true at the end of the number, when the cancan dancers generally turn their backs to the audience and lean forward, lifting up their skirts to reveal their bloomers.

Though several musical pieces have been written for the cancan, the most quintessential and famous piece is the "Galop Infernal" from the operetta "Orpheus in the Underworld."

You know:

Daah, da-da diddle da-da, da-da diddle da-da, da-da diddle da, dadadadadadada daah, da-da diddle da-da, da-da diddle da-da, da-da diddle da, da-diddle-da!

by Shreve Lamb and Harmon February 4, 2007

columbia

Poetic name for the Americas, mostly dating from the nineteenth century, a feminized version of Christopher Columbus' name. Also the name of a popular female personification of the United States around that time, particularly before the construction and dedication of the Statue of Liberty; the Columbia Pictures logo is an excellent example of this allegorical figure. Several cities, counties, neighborhoods and institutions in the U.S. have Columbia as or in their name — especially the capital, the District of Columbia. Canada's westernmost province is likewise named British Columbia.

Columbia is also how dumb people spell "Colombia," a friendly and colorful nation in South America that is unfortunately beset by drug-related conflict.

by Shreve Lamb and Harmon February 4, 2007