4 definitions by Rio9

Fishmalk

A 'Chaotic Random' character in TTRPGs, typically played by someone who doesn't really care about the game. While the other players work to gain the trust of the king, the Fishmalk runs up and slaps him with a duck. They are no fun to play with.

Ugh, last night's session was the worst. James was a Fishmalk and ruined the campaign.

by Rio9 May 27, 2019

The Internet

According to Titus Andromedon from Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt, “Kim, let me explain how the Internet works. See, it's not a big truck. It's a series of tubes, and those tubes are filled with the Internet. And it's coming here through the air.”

Kim, let me explain how the Internet works. See, it's not a big truck. It's a series of tubes, and those tubes are filled with the Internet. And it's coming here through the air.

by Rio9 July 3, 2018

DAM FAM

Something middle schoolers write on nine- lettered calculators for a laugh; an expression of amazement

Dude: haha
Other dude: What’s so funny?
Dude: Miles just wrote DAM FAM on his calculator lol
Other dude: lol

Guy: omg did u see what he is wearing? DAM FAM it’s ugly

by Rio9 July 3, 2018

fifth graders

In a private school, fifth graders find themselves grown into middle school, without any of their sixth grade public school friends’ advice, as they are being thrown into it, too. The main difference is that, at that point, only the girls are starting to go through puberty, and only very few. Meanwhile, they have to share the hallways with gimongous eighth graders (and their huge seventh grader posse), who, depending on the type of school, may shove them out of the way, beat them, make loud comments about stupid little fifth graders who should go die in a hole, etc. Fifth graders (at least pre- pubescent ones) have an advantage: they are small and fast. In the hallways, they can dart around the sixth and seventh graders to get to their lockers. Another thing: the lockers. Most fifth graders have not gone through puberty and are still kids. So they will construct fake floors and walls in their lockers to conceal their money. ლ($◡$ლ). None of them will have dated anyone by the end of the year, as their crushes are barely blossoming. While some of them may think otherwise, it is a blessing. Oh yeah, AND THIS ARTICLE WAS WRITTEN BY SOMEONE WHO JUST GRADUATED FROM FIFTH GRADE. TAKE THAT EIGHTH GRADERS!

Eighth grader: Jesus these stupid head fifth graders should die. (Fifth grader1 and Fifth grader2 dart past)
FG1: Wait what
FG2: Don’t care. I’m late!

by Rio9 July 3, 2018