Someone who logs for douches. Similiar to a logger or lumber jack, only with douches.
To be a douche logger, one would float uncut douches down a river, till they get to a douche plant. That plant will cut the douches to appropriate sizes, and then ship them off to another plant in order to complete the douche process.
Fred: Your sister is a succubus
Joe: At least she isn't like your dad, the douche logger.