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Quan Cao Tien's definitions

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The Cuckoo Clock

At about 3AM, I was drunk as a skunk because there was a lot of voddy. So, with a certain time limit, I did down it. I came home just in time to hear the cuckoo clock cuckoo three times. Quickly coming up with a plan, I cuckooed nine more times, hoping my wife would think it was midnight. I was very proud of myself.

The next day, my wife asked what time I got home, and I replied, "Midnight, just like I said."

She said that was good, and for some reason she said we needed a new cuckoo clock. When I asked why, she answered, "Last night when it cuckooed midnight, it cuckooed three times, said 'S%!t!,' cuckooed four more times, farted, cuckooed three times, cleared its throat, cuckooed two more times and then started giggling.
by quan cao tien August 19, 2010
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Nghe An

Nghe An or Nghean

Nghe An is a province in North Central Vietnam. It is the hometown of Ho Chi Minh, the former president of Vietnam as well as the cradle of nearly every talent in Vietnam. Nghe An people have won kudos for their intelligence, diligence, eagerness to study and their hospitality, cultural traditional imbued with national identity. Nghe An is fast changing with every passing days. Also, Nghe An is famous for its traditional folk songs which belong to a genre of traditional art, Vi Dam, and tobacco as well.
1. I have known many persons who turned their gold into smoke, but in Nghe An, people are the first to turn smoke into gold.

2. A blonde, a brunette and a red head were smoking cigarettes one afternoon. The blonde had Camels, red head had Marlboros, and the brunette had Nghe An rustic tobacco.
It began to pour down raining, so the red head and brunette both pull out a nodder and put it on their cigs. The blonde says "what are you doing?" - and they say "we're saving it for later!"
Impressed, and in a hurry, the blonde goes to the nearest store and asks for a nodder. The clerk says "What size? small, medium, or large?" She said "I dont know... one to fit a camel?"
by quan cao tien August 19, 2010
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HCMC

HCMC stands for "Ho Chi Minh City", Vietnam.
Attn: Cao Tien Quan,
32/89 B, Block 2.
Hamlet 32,
Tan Chanh Hiep Ward,
Dist. 12,
HCMC,
Vietnam.
by quan cao tien August 20, 2010
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Bill Gates

One of the richest guys in the world, a talent with a needle and soft dick.
One nite, Bill Gates slept with a whore at a five star hotel. And after having balled her, he asked, “How do you feel when you sleep with one of the richest men in the world like me?”.

The whore answered, “micro+soft”.
by quan cao tien August 25, 2010
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Shit stirrer

a person who tries to make situations in which people disagree even worse.
What a shit stirrer! She’s gone and told my trouble and strife that I was with another chick at the party.
by quan cao tien August 26, 2010
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Cark (it)

Princess Diana did cark (it) in a car crash in Paris.
by quan cao tien August 26, 2010
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caff

A cafe serving simple, basic food.
Dude 1: When working at that new institution, you should equip yourself with a car, a business suit, a gold wrist watch to make you much more attractive to new chicks there, man.

Dude 2: Do I need a dog and bone?

Dude 1: Absolutely, you need it to tell your top dog you are working while you are in the caff with pals during the office hours!
by quan cao tien August 26, 2010
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