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Pollup's definitions

Good times

Something you say when someone enthusiastically tells you about something that you think is retarded. It generally gives them the impression that you care, but provides an opportunity to get into a new conversation without being rude.

Excellent for dealing with co-workers who tell you about "their crazy weekend," when your weekend was in fact 18 times crazier and involved at least two activities that were illegal.
"Morning Charlie. Man, I had the craziest weekend ever! I had three beers and totally danced up a storm at the bar. It was the neatest time ever."

*(internal monologue): holy crap...this guy sucks ass. I wonder what he would say if I told him about my weekend. Let's see, I did about 16 grams of shrooms, chugged a bottle of whiskey, and then smoked a whole bunch of weed. Then I thought I saw Jesus and chased him down the street with an axe. I woke up in a pool of vomit in Mexico and had to hitch a ride back home with some illegal immigrants...

"Wow, Frank, that sure sounds like a lot of fun! Good times...Anyway - see you later."
by Pollup December 25, 2007
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Poonis

What you get after fucking a guy in the ass when he hasn't taken a dump in a few days. A Penis covered in Poo.
Grandpa (in a pirate voice): arrrrrgggg, Billy. Me matey. Shiver me anus!

Billy: first mate reporting for duty!

Grandpa: 'tis a fine instrument you got there, Billy. All hands on the poop deck.

Billy: oh Gramps. Here it comes...

Grandpa: garrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr. That's the stuff.

10 minutes later:

Billy: awwwwww - sick. Grandpa, I have a Poonis.

Grandpa: yarrrr. Gross. Time for a colostomy bag...
by Pollup October 3, 2008
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chan tigah

A member of an opposing gang that has killed one of your homies in the past. Although your first instinct is to exact revenge on that motherfucker, you are aware that it may ignite another gang war. Gang wars, although hilarious and fun, are not desired by the warlords in the ghetto because they attract attention to the underworld from Whitey and/or "The Man." Quite often, you are a Chan Tigah to someone else because you gunned down his cousin at the taco stand. The huge number of Chan Tigahs in the Ghetto is what sociologists refer to as "Street Brinkmanship," meaning, since everyone has Chan Tigah status, no one can kill anyone for fear of starting a huge gang war.

A Chan Tigah is a politically complex term for an enemy that you want to kill but can't.
I wanted to kill that motherfucker chan tigah last night in the back alley, but "Five Tooth Tre Dog" told me to wait until the heat was off.
by pollup January 11, 2008
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dink toucher

A casual reference to someone that you don't hate, but think is a really huge loser. There is no reason for thinking he is a loser, he just is.

Generally, dink touchers are super nice guys with lots of friends. However, when you meet them, you just think: "man, this guy is a huge dink toucher."

When you are hanging around with dink touchers, you generally pretend to be friends with them. But when you get home, you complain to your wife/girlfriend about how much they suck and that you don't want to hang around with them any more. Then your wife/girlfriend gets mad at you and asks you to explain why that guy was a dink toucher. You don't have an explanation and lose the argument. Then you end up hanging around with the guy over and over again.
Last night I was hanging out with my wife's work friends. There was this one guy, Steve, and he was a super-huge dink toucher.

How so?

I don't know. He just was.
by Pollup December 25, 2007
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mumps

When your testicles get inflamed and cause sterility.
Man, that guy has the mumps!

What?! Man, his testicles must be harshly sterile and inflamed.

Yeah. Nasty.
by Pollup December 29, 2007
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Diarrhea Porn

When a porn movie is about, features, or includes some kind of diarrhea in someone's mouth or snootch.
Hey Father William! Check out this video my mom sent me. Diarrhea porn!
by Pollup February 3, 2008
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Shitesticles

When a big fat guy steps on your belly and ruptures your intestines. The poop squishes down into you scrotum causing your testicles to get all shitty.
Ah, dude. That guy caused Billy to get shitesticles.
by Pollup January 11, 2008
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