Pollup's definitions
Not quite the same as wigger-speak, Suburb Ebonics is a form of language used by middle class white kids who secretly wish that they were black but won't admit it to anyone.
Commonly, the white males get together on the weekend and binge drink (often a college activity) and mystically start "talking like black people" after they've had 10 drinks. Of course, the style of speech in no way reflects the way that black people actually talk, but at least they're trying.
The hilarious thing about these homos is that they would never in a million years talk that way around another black dude. It's like a strange style of speech that is preserved entirely for the whitey club. It makes them feel like they have a cause in life - like they were oppressed and have to be gangstas to rebel against the man. Unfortunately for them, their Dads bought them their cars and the worst thing that ever happened to them is getting busted smoking crappy weed in the basement.
The tragic thing about these pathetic white kids is that they are secretly cowards who run away from fights, can't hold their liquor, are literally frightened by black people and the worst thing they've ever done is break a window. Suburb Ebonics is like a cover for "HUGE GIANT PUSSY."
Commonly, the white males get together on the weekend and binge drink (often a college activity) and mystically start "talking like black people" after they've had 10 drinks. Of course, the style of speech in no way reflects the way that black people actually talk, but at least they're trying.
The hilarious thing about these homos is that they would never in a million years talk that way around another black dude. It's like a strange style of speech that is preserved entirely for the whitey club. It makes them feel like they have a cause in life - like they were oppressed and have to be gangstas to rebel against the man. Unfortunately for them, their Dads bought them their cars and the worst thing that ever happened to them is getting busted smoking crappy weed in the basement.
The tragic thing about these pathetic white kids is that they are secretly cowards who run away from fights, can't hold their liquor, are literally frightened by black people and the worst thing they've ever done is break a window. Suburb Ebonics is like a cover for "HUGE GIANT PUSSY."
The Tragic End of Suburb Ebonics at Lonnie's House:
Lonnie: sup Beaker? Man, I fucked that guy up in that fight last night. Muthuh fuckuh. He was all like "whaaaa, I'm a loser." Then I smacked that bitch UP!
Beaker: Yeah L-dog. S'right. You messed that muthuh fucuh UP right on him an shit. That's some fucking wick-ass shit.
Lonnie: A'ight
Beaker: Ok, dude...I can't do this anymore. We didn't get in a fight. We sat here and talked like retards for three hours last night. I gotta go. My Dad said not to stay out too late. We've been doing the same thing every weekend for 6 years!
Lonnie: But...but...dude? What's wrong here?
Beaker: Nothing. I have to go. Sorry dude. This is just way too gay. See ya.
Lonnie: sup Beaker? Man, I fucked that guy up in that fight last night. Muthuh fuckuh. He was all like "whaaaa, I'm a loser." Then I smacked that bitch UP!
Beaker: Yeah L-dog. S'right. You messed that muthuh fucuh UP right on him an shit. That's some fucking wick-ass shit.
Lonnie: A'ight
Beaker: Ok, dude...I can't do this anymore. We didn't get in a fight. We sat here and talked like retards for three hours last night. I gotta go. My Dad said not to stay out too late. We've been doing the same thing every weekend for 6 years!
Lonnie: But...but...dude? What's wrong here?
Beaker: Nothing. I have to go. Sorry dude. This is just way too gay. See ya.
by Pollup January 18, 2008
Get the Suburb Ebonics mug.What you get after fucking a guy in the ass when he hasn't taken a dump in a few days. A Penis covered in Poo.
Grandpa (in a pirate voice): arrrrrgggg, Billy. Me matey. Shiver me anus!
Billy: first mate reporting for duty!
Grandpa: 'tis a fine instrument you got there, Billy. All hands on the poop deck.
Billy: oh Gramps. Here it comes...
Grandpa: garrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr. That's the stuff.
10 minutes later:
Billy: awwwwww - sick. Grandpa, I have a Poonis.
Grandpa: yarrrr. Gross. Time for a colostomy bag...
Billy: first mate reporting for duty!
Grandpa: 'tis a fine instrument you got there, Billy. All hands on the poop deck.
Billy: oh Gramps. Here it comes...
Grandpa: garrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr. That's the stuff.
10 minutes later:
Billy: awwwwww - sick. Grandpa, I have a Poonis.
Grandpa: yarrrr. Gross. Time for a colostomy bag...
by Pollup October 3, 2008
Get the Poonis mug.Man, I was battling the Empire and accidentally shot Chewie in the ankle with my laser gun. He grabbed me and threw me across the room. Then he roared at my nuts and they shriveled up into little puff balls.
They were Ewok balls.
They were Ewok balls.
by Pollup January 14, 2008
Get the Ewok balls mug.When you trick a seemingly innocent girl into letting you have anal sex with her, and you return from the bathroom to find that she's gone and has taken a huge shit in the middle of your bed.
Sometimes, if she was super pissed about it, she takes the dump in your drawer and you don't find it for a few days.
Sometimes, if she was super pissed about it, she takes the dump in your drawer and you don't find it for a few days.
Biff: "Hey Floyd - that stupid slut you hooked me up with last night. Yeah, uh, I don't know how to tell you this, but she crapped in my bed."
Floyd: "Uh...what do you mean?"
Biff: "Are you retarded? I fucked Leona in the ass, and then when I went to wash my cock off she took a massive crap in my bed. Those sheets will never be the same. Corn and peas. NA-A-STY!
Floyd: "Corn AND peas? That is fucking rotten. I mean, if it was only corn I could see-"
Biff: "Shut up you asshole. Listen, you're not going to tell ANYONE about this. I'll beat your ass if you do. But seriously, that bitch got pretty hard revenge on me. My mama gave me those sheets and she always asks about them. How can I tell her that some skank took a huge, squirrelly dump in them because I analed her?"
Floyd: "Just tell her that a homeless guy broke into your-"
Biff: "Dude, you suck."
Floyd: "Uh...what do you mean?"
Biff: "Are you retarded? I fucked Leona in the ass, and then when I went to wash my cock off she took a massive crap in my bed. Those sheets will never be the same. Corn and peas. NA-A-STY!
Floyd: "Corn AND peas? That is fucking rotten. I mean, if it was only corn I could see-"
Biff: "Shut up you asshole. Listen, you're not going to tell ANYONE about this. I'll beat your ass if you do. But seriously, that bitch got pretty hard revenge on me. My mama gave me those sheets and she always asks about them. How can I tell her that some skank took a huge, squirrelly dump in them because I analed her?"
Floyd: "Just tell her that a homeless guy broke into your-"
Biff: "Dude, you suck."
by Pollup December 25, 2007
Get the revenge mug.When a terrorist is about to set off a suicide bomb in the middle of a Middle Eastern market and shits himself before he can set off the bomb. Generally, the poo flies all over the place and ruins all the food in the market.
Akmed: sup Mohammed? Wow, this market is really packed, eh? Check out Abdul with his big, fancy chicken stand over there. Oh, look at me; I'm Abdul and I think I'm so important with my magical chicken stand. I provide protein for people and think I'm the hottest shit in town.
Mohammed: Ha ha. So true, so true. And what's with the ridiculous hat? Like, is the guy too cool to wear a turban? He thinks he's so Western with his flashy ball cap...it says "New York Mets" on it. What the fuck is that?
Akmed: I KNOW! Have you ever seen his wife? She doesn't even wear a Burka - like HELLO? Um...I wonder if she's going to hell.
Mohammed: Maybe she's a New York Met. Maybe that's what the hat means. Like, yeah...I'm Kuljeet and I'm Abdul's wife and I want to be New York Met - I'm so cool. Or maybe it means that she is not a virgin? Who knows. They are freaking weird.
Akmed: oh,oh -watch! He's killing the chicken. JUST DO IT ALREADY! Oh shit, do you think he heard me? Ha ha...duck! Ok, he didn't see us. I hate that about him. He always has to toss the chicken up in the air and then cut it's head off with -
************BOOM************!
Akmed: What happened?
Mohammed: Run! Suicide bomber!!!!!!!!!!!
Akmed: No, wait - what is that all over...?
Mohammed: Sick. Dude. There's shit everywhere. Must've been one of those suicide shitters. That is nasty.
Akmed: Yeah, like seriously. Hold it together for just another second, man. I hate those guys that are all scared and crap there pants right before. So lame.
Mohammed: I know. Ha ha - look! Abdul's stand has shit all over it. YEAH BITCH! Try and sell those chickens now, motherfucker! What a loser.
Akmed: Let's go take a shower.
Mohammed: uh...
Mohammed: Ha ha. So true, so true. And what's with the ridiculous hat? Like, is the guy too cool to wear a turban? He thinks he's so Western with his flashy ball cap...it says "New York Mets" on it. What the fuck is that?
Akmed: I KNOW! Have you ever seen his wife? She doesn't even wear a Burka - like HELLO? Um...I wonder if she's going to hell.
Mohammed: Maybe she's a New York Met. Maybe that's what the hat means. Like, yeah...I'm Kuljeet and I'm Abdul's wife and I want to be New York Met - I'm so cool. Or maybe it means that she is not a virgin? Who knows. They are freaking weird.
Akmed: oh,oh -watch! He's killing the chicken. JUST DO IT ALREADY! Oh shit, do you think he heard me? Ha ha...duck! Ok, he didn't see us. I hate that about him. He always has to toss the chicken up in the air and then cut it's head off with -
************BOOM************!
Akmed: What happened?
Mohammed: Run! Suicide bomber!!!!!!!!!!!
Akmed: No, wait - what is that all over...?
Mohammed: Sick. Dude. There's shit everywhere. Must've been one of those suicide shitters. That is nasty.
Akmed: Yeah, like seriously. Hold it together for just another second, man. I hate those guys that are all scared and crap there pants right before. So lame.
Mohammed: I know. Ha ha - look! Abdul's stand has shit all over it. YEAH BITCH! Try and sell those chickens now, motherfucker! What a loser.
Akmed: Let's go take a shower.
Mohammed: uh...
by Pollup January 31, 2008
Get the Suicide Shitter mug.A member of an opposing gang that has killed one of your homies in the past. Although your first instinct is to exact revenge on that motherfucker, you are aware that it may ignite another gang war. Gang wars, although hilarious and fun, are not desired by the warlords in the ghetto because they attract attention to the underworld from Whitey and/or "The Man." Quite often, you are a Chan Tigah to someone else because you gunned down his cousin at the taco stand. The huge number of Chan Tigahs in the Ghetto is what sociologists refer to as "Street Brinkmanship," meaning, since everyone has Chan Tigah status, no one can kill anyone for fear of starting a huge gang war.
A Chan Tigah is a politically complex term for an enemy that you want to kill but can't.
A Chan Tigah is a politically complex term for an enemy that you want to kill but can't.
I wanted to kill that motherfucker chan tigah last night in the back alley, but "Five Tooth Tre Dog" told me to wait until the heat was off.
by pollup January 11, 2008
Get the chan tigah mug.Man, that guy has the mumps!
What?! Man, his testicles must be harshly sterile and inflamed.
Yeah. Nasty.
What?! Man, his testicles must be harshly sterile and inflamed.
Yeah. Nasty.
by Pollup December 29, 2007
Get the mumps mug.