Like fractional sex
, fictional sex is sex you make up to boost your stats (the notches on your belt in other words). Or, it can also be sex you deny ever having, out of fear of having too high of a bed count
, or out of embarrassment that the person you had it with was sketchy. Basically, if you lie about whether or not you got laid, it's fictional sex.
Bob: Dude, I nailed Cassandra last night! I'm up to 22 notches on my belt already. How many you got?
Dan: Twenty-two? Yeah right! How many of those 22 are fictional sex? Probably more than half. I'd be surprised if you even nailed ten chicks.
Andrea: I heard you left the party with Bob last night. Does that mean you're up to nine different guys now?
Casandra: Shut up! Nothing happened. We just kissed a bit and I made him take me home. And I'm not up to eight yet either! I've only done like three guys. Honest.
Andrea: Yeah... sure... three guys this month. Sounds like fictional sex to me.
Similar to Bed Count
. One's Head count is the number of times you've gone down on someone, performed oral sex. Many people believe that oral sex doesn't count as a full notch on your belt, so Head Count is adjusted as Fractional Sex
Kim: "Well, add one to my head count. I just went down on David in the back seat of his car. I guess I'm up to 15 now."
Krista: "Well, that's fractional sex, so it only counts as 10, especially if you didn't swallow."
Kim: "I swallow every time."
Krista: "Okay, 12.5 then."
verb: to reduce someone to the status of a bitch, a weak and obedient underling that does your will out of sheer intimidation. Similar to embarassed, except with more direct connotations to one's bitchhood. Usually being embitched is a bad thing, but not always.
Maxine: Get the fuckin' yard cleaned up, Daryl you useless shit!
Mike: Dude! Don't let her embitch you like that. If you let it go now, it'll be like that you're entire relationship. Be a man!
Daryl: Sorry, bro. I was embitched long ago.
Jack: Woman, you better be naked when I get home, holding an ice-cold beer and a bottle of lube!
Dana: -sigh- I've been embitched.
1. (noun) Sex with someone so easy (or ugly) that they don't even count as a full notch on your belt. Similar to Fictional Sex
, sex that's either made up to boost one's numbers, or falsely denied to reduce the bed count
2. Sex that's so lousy, it doesn't even count as a full fuck.
3. Sex that's so amazing, or so difficult to score, it counts as several notches on your belt.
1. Bob: "Man, I fucked 1/3 of a girl last night."
Dan: "What do you mean? Where was the rest of her?"
Bob: "It was fractional sex, this chick named Amy. All I had to do was buy her one drink and she was back at my place. She was so easy, it doesn't even count as a full lay."
2. Krista: "How many guys have you been with, Amy?"
Amy: "Two and a quarter?"
Krista: "Two and a quarter? How do you fuck 25% of a guy?"
Amy: "It was this guy name Dan. He was so shitty in bed, it don't even count as a full lay. He had a little dick and he only lasted two minutes."
Krista: "Ah, fractional sex. I've had a few of those. I'm up to 3.4 I think."
Amy: "3.4, huh? Sounds like fictional sex to me. You're forgetting about those two guys you did on Spring Break, and that Jerry guy, and that professor you went down on, and-"
Krista: "Shut up! You made your point."
3. Will: "Well, it took me seven months, $500 in dating expenses, and four bullshit love poems, but I finally got Destiny in bed last night. And man, it was so worth it! She blew my fucking mind! I swear that counts as ten notches on my belt right there."
Steve: "Ah yeah, fractional action, huh? Nice."
1. (verb) Dance, specifically swing dance
2. (noun) a Dance, specifically a swing dance
1. "I'm gonna jump with my baby, no I don't mean maybe tonight" - Big Bad Voodoo Daddy
2. "We're heading out to the jump."
adverb: a feeling of overwhelming sexual arousal that comes over you when you've got no other sexual outlet than masturbation (wanking off
, having a wank
, etc.). Like horny
except that horniness may include the arousal that comes when you actually have a partner to relieve the sexual tension with, or can get one.
Carrie: "God, I watched Troy again and I've been feeling wanky over Brad Pitt all day."
Janet: "Why do you do this to yourself? Just call up Greg and get him down there for a booty call
Carrie: "I can't. He'll think I still have feelings for him. I'm just gonna get in a hot bath and wank
it out of my system."
Ejaculation for the sake of visual appeal, rather than physical appeal, usually onto one's sexual partner, and especially as part of videotaped sex. The implication is that such a visually appealing shot will generate monetary profit for the video in question that it wouldn't have otherwise had without it.
"Here comes the money shot. Get ready."