27 definitions by Old Lang Guy

Any exceptionally stupid or illiterate phrase found in a pop song. Particularly if it's then defended or expounded upon in various "meanings of lyrics" sites or in fan writing. A lot of pop stars were so totally created by parents/managers/agents/etc. that they went straight from a suburban bedroom to the celeb suites without having read a book or talked to a real person on the way, getting all their alleged education from other pop songs and tv.

The words "fork stuck in the road" originally occurred in a Green Day song, and in a later interview (urban legend has it) the songwriter came up with a long story about how people on journeys would stick a dinner fork into the road to show they'd been there or some such -- apparently being unaware that a dinner fork was originally a "forked spoon", i.e. one that split, the way a forked stick or a forked road splits, and that a "fork in the road" is a place where you make a decision, not a milestone or boundary marker. (I can find no evidence that any such interview occurred, but it seems to be widely believed in).
"Hey, somebody should tell Alanis that every time you hear the rolling thunder, it means the lightning already missed you. And read her a definition of ironic."

"That's like so unfair! She was saying that like, he runs away when there's no reason to! And she was making fun of the way people use the word ironic wrong!"

"Naw, it was just another fork stuck in the road. She's the fork stuck in the road goddess."
by Old Lang Guy September 9, 2006
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A pair of shorts so short (esp. in the crotch) that it's physically possible to have intercourse with a woman wearing them without having to pull them down.
See any Girls Gone Wild video for plenty of girls in tugovers!

We were making out and I got two fingers around one side of her tugovers.
by Old Lang Guy August 27, 2010
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A noun in military, engineering, and political speak. Means the period of preparation leading up to roll-out, especially the most frantic no-sleep, no-time, any-expense, just get something no matter what period.
That whole week was the run up to Operation Blue Arrow, so I got about three hours of sleep a night if I was lucky.

Wooo-hoo, unlimited overtime for the run up to the release of MyThing!

We'll need the major nets, papers, and blogs watched twenty-four seven for the run up to the Iowa caucuses.
by Old Lang Guy September 5, 2006
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Meditation term for a mind that refuses to be quiet and concentrated, so that your meditation is interfered with by your attention constantly finding new objects, like a monkey roaming through your brain.
If I concentrate very quietly I am sure I can think of an example, such as I wonder if Sandra wears panties in the summer?, no I mean an example of monkey mind, for which I need to concentrate like lemon juice concentrate god that's the best stuff for making lemonade to families with dependent children like monkeys infesting the mind and asking questions authority and authorizes questions come on there has to be an example of monkey mind your own business monkey business suit monkey suit
by Old Lang Guy October 17, 2006
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Jeans so low cut that some pubic hair curls over the belt buckle; thought to be daring and sexy by a certain kind of younger woman.
That can't be her real hair color!

It's not, check what's sticking out of her pube jeans.
by Old Lang Guy October 17, 2006
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A misunderstanding of the old scientist/techie joke that a millihelen is the amount of beauty needed to launch one ship. Milli- is the international scientific prefix for 1/1000. Most international units are named after someone -- watt for power, newton for force, ampere for current, and so on. Scientists, techs, and gears who work with those prefixes all the time often attach them to all sorts of made-up units. So a megahelen would be the beauty of a face that launched a billion ships (one million times one thousand) and a nanohelen would be the face that launched one millionth of a ship (one billionth times one thousand). Millihelen worked better a few decades ago when newspapers and TV news often carried stories about ship launchings, because usually the woman christening the ship launch was a First Lady, the Queen, or some senator or lord's wife (what nowadays we call a first wife, the one before the trophy wife), and thus a lizardy old bag that was only sort of recognizably female.
"That one's a mini-Helen."

"Unless she's a real cute midget, you mean she's got about a millihelen. Go back to chemistry class and stop getting your science from Star Trek reruns!"
by Old Lang Guy September 8, 2006
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