27 definitions by Old Lang Guy

Top Definition
The rule that if you listen very seriously and intently, with a deeply caring expression, to anyone until 4:30 a.m., they then must have sex with you. Sometimes a verb as well. Comes from the original, good version of Bedazzled, with Peter Cook (as the devil) and Dudley Moore (as the guy being tempted).
"Have you thought of just applying the rule of half past four?"

"What is it?"

"If you can stay wide awake and gaze at her thinking 'You are fascinating,' the whole time she talks, for everything she says, no matter how pointless and no matter how stupid, till half past four in the morning, you're in." (Not an exact quote)

I wanted her so bad that one night when she was drunk and dumping all this self pity, I kept telling her what an interesting person she was, until I finally half past foured my way into her pants.
by old lang guy August 25, 2007
Gradual but inexorable increase in anger, eventually becoming outright rage or fury; what happens as a patient or slow-witted person figures out what has happened and why it is significant. NOT the insult, but the process that the insult (or other upsetting thing) starts in the victim.
"Beware the fury of a patient man" -- Seneca was talking about the consequences of a slow burn here.

At first Ned liked to think his new girlfriend was popular, but as that progressed to flirty, and then to "widely available even when Ned was right there", he began to do a slow burn about it; finding her topless in the kitchen at a party was the last straw.

She did a slow burn over the fact that her roommate borrowed things, didn't return them, gradually assumed she owned them, and finally began to lend them out and give them away herself.

He dented my car and at first it was no big deal; I left a note on his windshield saying we'd figure out what to do about it, but when I didn't hear from him for months, except promises that we'd get in touch real soon, I started to do a slow burn.
by old lang guy December 11, 2008
The "private live show" booths at the back of some porn shops and strip clubs, where a girl strips, masturbates, and/or inserts dildos on the lighted side of the glass, while the paying customer jacks off in the dark on the other side of the glass. A few of them are fronts for prostitution or have glory holes, but most are just places for a guy to have a quiet private yank on his crank while a pretty girl shows off to him.
Sandy got tired of guys trying to get under the G-string when they tucked in a bill, so she started working at the slut in a box club.

He didn't have the money for a hooker or even for a rub-and-tug so he ended up going to a slut in a box.
by old lang guy September 24, 2006
Checking whether I am a real street thug or just a guy doing the clothes and the talk.
First party out of jail and this little suburban Megan was testin' my gangsta, she only wanted me if I'd really done time.
by old lang guy November 16, 2006
1: Double useless, something with no point at all. Comes off of "tits on" any male mammal, since males don't nurse the young; chickens of course don't nurse their young at all, so tits would be especially useless on a rooster.

2: derogatory for tiny or very small breasts
He's not even tits on a boar, at best he's tits on a rooster.

So we had it about worked out when Tits on a Rooster finally showed up, and it all had to have his input.

She's got about the same tits God gave a rooster.
by old lang guy October 29, 2006
hip
When used ironically, used by young artists (teens-30) to refer to work that will convince 30-40 year old money people that it will appeal to young people; not necessarily what the young artist or his/her young audience wants, but what the money people feel they should want.
"How's the mural on the coffeehouse wall coming?"
"The backer drove in from the suburbs and said it wasn't hip enough, so now I've got to put in a bunch of oldstyle stuff so he'll think it'll appeal to young people."

The band is young, intellectual, and hip=a 40-year-old rock critic can't fit into their jeans, but gets their inside jokes, and would have loved them when he was twenty.

Publisher (who is fifty) to a roomful of 20 year old writers and editors: we've got to remake the mag into something hip that will appeal to 20 somethings. Writer (after he goes): So is hip the new lame? Editor: No, hip is what we'd like if we liked what he'd like us to like.
by old lang guy August 27, 2010
Meditation term for a mind that refuses to be quiet and concentrated, so that your meditation is interfered with by your attention constantly finding new objects, like a monkey roaming through your brain.
If I concentrate very quietly I am sure I can think of an example, such as I wonder if Sandra wears panties in the summer?, no I mean an example of monkey mind, for which I need to concentrate like lemon juice concentrate god that's the best stuff for making lemonade to families with dependent children like monkeys infesting the mind and asking questions authority and authorizes questions come on there has to be an example of monkey mind your own business monkey business suit monkey suit
by old lang guy October 17, 2006
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