rouse

A Northerners term for a rodent that has the appearance of a mouse from the front, but the long tail of a rat, hence rouse. Seldom seen before nightfall, these shy beasts feed on scraps of waste from Kebab shops and pizza parlours.
I saw what looked like a cross between a mouse and a rat outside that kebab shop last night, I think it was a rouse, bastard thing!
by Nigel Fleming July 15, 2006
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skundered

The Irish version of bored. Used by hill billy locals in back street, one pony towns to try to sound intelligent.
Heh, Seamus, did you get up to anything intersting last night?
Nah, I was so skundered I ended up reading the Dictionary.
by Nigel Fleming July 13, 2006
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stubborn turd

An especially annoying piece of faecal matter that will try its damndest to stay in your anus, as if clinging on to life itself. Blood vesels may be burst trying to shift one of these bastards, be careful!
Oh my God, half an hour it took me to drop that stubborn turd from my arse, but boy was it worth the wait!
by Nigel Fleming July 13, 2006
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tuppeny whore

A lady of the night who will perform any sordid act for the meagre price of a tuppeny bit( Old British coin). These women roamed the streets around the start of the 20th century, waiting for men to cross their filthy palms with the modern day equivalent of the price of a cup of coffee. Very skanky ladies indeed.
I say Humphry, have you any plans this evening?
Why no Henry, shall we partake of a tuppeny whore a piece, then retire to our wives?
by Nigel Fleming July 19, 2006
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dead egg

A particularlt revolting smell expelled from your anus that has the aroma of a rotten, dying egg.
Oh my God, can you smell that? Some bastard has just dropped a dead egg!
by Nigel Fleming July 06, 2006
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paula radcliffe

Noun: To do a paula radcliffe. The act of not bothering to make much of an effort to win something, unless there is a financial gain to be made. This applies especially when representing your country for nothing when you cannot be arsed compared to winning marathons by a mile where huge sums of cash are involved.

Neil: God I cannot wait to see the rowers at the next Olympic Games.
Nigel: Me too lets just hope they don't do a paula radcliffe on us and save themselves for the Henley Royal Regatta!
by Nigel Fleming August 05, 2006
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abort a turd

The act of expelling a shit early, before it is naturally ready to be given birth to. Such an act results in excrutiating pain and usually an increase in blood pressure, rather than the euphoric sensation experienced when dropping a turd as nature planned.
Christ on a bike, that curry last night was so hot I had to abort a turd, it absolutely killed!
by Nigel Fleming July 09, 2006
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