1 definition by Moriarty1991

Top Definition
A rural village near Canterbury, Kent with its own St Mary's church. It also has a local primary school which is frankly a hovel of learning full to the brim with the local scallywag pikes and other chav riff-raff, occasionally gifted youth are sent there and make it to secondary school but fewer still carry on to do A-levels or proper university degrees, let alone learn to read or spell.
It contains many picturesque houses and cottages by the river Stour which runs directly through the village to power the newspaper factory via a watermill. It is the main manufacturer of the Kent Gazette, a small and thoroughly useless article which only contains information that the geriatric or otherwise mentally derranged would care about. Chartham is rather ruined by the area of slums known as "The Hyde", where Chavs and Irish-Tinker-Settlers use their spawn to collect benefits from the government to build their nests. They are an invasive sub-species of human (Homo Homonculus?) and have spread in recent years at an alarming rate. They can give birth to litters of 4 and can raise up to 8 at one time.
I really want to get out of this shit-hole chartham because there is nothing to do
by Moriarty1991 February 01, 2011

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