19 definitions by Mjolnir12982
Based upon the introductory social practice of gripping another's phallus in an overhand fashion, and providing an unrequested and unsanitary, yet meaty, sweaty, and oddly satisfying handjob, engaged in by boy scout masters to their pledges once their parents' minivans get lost on the horizon. May also be accompanied by a frigid and unsolicited finger in the anus or a halitosis-laden and toothy rimjob. Because hey, Traps are gay, but a mouth is a mouthand 20 bucks is twenty bucks.
Look man I have a buyer lined up for the drugs! You gonna tell me where they are? Or you wanna give me the ol' Scoutmaster's Handshake all day!?!
by Mjolnir12982 October 31, 2018
Derived from the term Blitzkrieg, or lightning war in German, to verbally Blitzkrieg somebody is to attack them in in machine-gun repetition who is the most brutal insults you can muster at any given point in time, not pausing to take a breath, or allow your opponent a word edgewise. The name is of course derived from the strategy of shock Warfare tactics utilized by the Nazis in World War II period however no one actually dies during a verbal Blitzkrieg, but the goal is to make the other person wish they were dead.
Guy 1: (tells boring bullshit story,)
Guy 2: you know that story actually reminds me of the last time I was fucking your mother? I was one of the first guys in line so she hadn't been used up yet, anywho... I decided at that point to go ass to pussy, and I remember thinking to myself distinctly that her pussy was so fucking tight, no fucking way of baby came out of there no fucking way, you're adopted dude. Then her sibilance, would you tasted like hot dog water by the way, spattered me about the face so I reach back the fucking Florida and pimp slap that bitch in the middle of Nebraska just like the Avenue where I picked her up for the gangbang for a crack rock and hit a crystal meth in 20 bucks. And after that I told her how much I just wish that she had either swallowed you or made like you were her car keys locked inside of her Sentra and pulled you out with a coat hanger.
Guy 1: okay enough with the verbal Blitzkrieg, I'll stop telling the fucking story.
Guy 2: you know that story actually reminds me of the last time I was fucking your mother? I was one of the first guys in line so she hadn't been used up yet, anywho... I decided at that point to go ass to pussy, and I remember thinking to myself distinctly that her pussy was so fucking tight, no fucking way of baby came out of there no fucking way, you're adopted dude. Then her sibilance, would you tasted like hot dog water by the way, spattered me about the face so I reach back the fucking Florida and pimp slap that bitch in the middle of Nebraska just like the Avenue where I picked her up for the gangbang for a crack rock and hit a crystal meth in 20 bucks. And after that I told her how much I just wish that she had either swallowed you or made like you were her car keys locked inside of her Sentra and pulled you out with a coat hanger.
Guy 1: okay enough with the verbal Blitzkrieg, I'll stop telling the fucking story.
by Mjolnir12982 June 13, 2017
When having vaginal sex in the doggy style position, the guy inserts his index finger into her asshole, removing a globule of shit. When she turs around to ask what the fuck he thinks he is doing, he attempts to paint a line from the closest side of her face down the length of her body. Extra points if he makes it to her ankle before she presses charges.
Bro 1: Dude, you and Krista are still down for that 5fdp show Friday, right?
Bro 2: Nah. I gave her the old Himalayan Pinstripe the other day, so we are done, I am broke from posting bail, and the judge said I couldn't leave the county...
Bro 2: Nah. I gave her the old Himalayan Pinstripe the other day, so we are done, I am broke from posting bail, and the judge said I couldn't leave the county...
by Mjolnir12982 June 15, 2016
The feeling one gets when their asshole is stretched to excess by what is passing through it, either on the way out, or the way in. Characterized by a change in the walking motion of the sufferer, constant digging or checking in the ass, or if seated on a park bench or open car trunk, the actual anus hanging out
CANDY: You ok, Cindy? You look like you're in pain...
CINDY: I ate a lot of popcorn when we saw CLASH OF THE TITANS and got constipated, so I just unleashed the Kraken and now I have a bronc-anus...
DAMON: Mike, stop sitting on the trunk latch of your car. Your Bronc-Anus is hanging out. You have a lot of buttsex or something?
MIKE: In prison such decisions aren't always yours to make...
CINDY: I ate a lot of popcorn when we saw CLASH OF THE TITANS and got constipated, so I just unleashed the Kraken and now I have a bronc-anus...
DAMON: Mike, stop sitting on the trunk latch of your car. Your Bronc-Anus is hanging out. You have a lot of buttsex or something?
MIKE: In prison such decisions aren't always yours to make...
by Mjolnir12982 April 18, 2010
When you have a dream that you are a big, plump, steamy, juicy hotdog, so big and plump that the bun will not close around you. Then you realize that ketchup is sliding out the end of the bun, and then you wake up incarcerated, and your cellmate's chin is resting on your shoulder while he's fucking you up the asshole...
Hey, in prison such choices aren't always yours to make.
Hey, in prison such choices aren't always yours to make.
Jim got himself locked up and had the hotdog Dream. Now he can't shit without it looking like a Swiss cake roll.
by Mjolnir12982 September 5, 2016
Hillarrhea is an extreme former of ass hurt felt exclusively by indoctrinated liberal zombies who were disappointed when the lying, murderous, traitorous socialist power-hungry lesbian android cuntbag they mistakenly worship as the picture of strength and feminism gets beaten to the Oval Office by the orange guy from celebrity apprentice, coincidentally the only guy getting more side ass than her husband. Symptoms include calling anyone who may have a differing opinion a misogynist/homophobe/xenophobe/ islamophobe/racist/bigot/deplorable or any combination thereof, and protesting outside Trump's hotel.
The mass amount of Hillarrhea see from those who drank Hillary'so kool-aid only proves that while liberals paint conservative so as intolerant, the liberals themselves are the most intolerant people of all!
by Mjolnir12982 November 10, 2016
1) Aggressive punitive Act of sneaking into your own home, catching someone else fucking your wife/girlfriend, popping a Viagra, slamming a bottle of Jack Daniels, and then forcibly sodomizing him up the ass while he is still inside your lady. That man becomes the Penis Inbetweenus.
2) Urban dictionary editors who reject your submitted definitions!
2) Urban dictionary editors who reject your submitted definitions!
Does Urban Dictionary editor's who reject definitions, creating rift between author and audience, can be a real Penis Inbetweenus...
by Mjolnir12982 February 28, 2018