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Litchrilly

A butchered, retarded version of the word "literally". Used by skanky teens and total fuckwits. It is usually placed in a sentence before something that didn't or wouldn't happen, owing to the fact that the speakers do not understand the english language, and have no comprehension of what the word "literally" means.

Listen to teenage girls try to out-cool each other on a bus, and you'll hear the word at least 50 times.
"I was so annoyed, I litchrilly exploded"
"If i find out it's true I will litchrilly kill them"

"His cock was litchrilly as big as a horses"
"Oh my god, I will litchrilly DIE if he asks me out!"
by MagickDio March 14, 2010
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Fuck Nemesis

Like a fuck buddy except this person isn't your buddy in any way shape or form. You have nothing but contempt, loathing and disgust for each other as people. Yet you call them or receive a text from them every time you're lonely or they're horny and you get it on. There will be no talking, except to trade insults. You will have no need to discuss "keeping this a secret" as you're both too ashamed to reveal this to anyone.

Ex's, long term partners and co workers can all become Fuck Nemeses.
"Dear Diary,

I felt sad and lonely so I called Clive to come over and we had sex, after he called me a fat bitch. Oh, I need a boyfriend, not a fuck nemesis."

"Can't be bothered to try and pull or be nice to anyone. Time to call my fuck nemesis"
by MagickDio February 18, 2010
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Magical Mummy

Non existent ideal. The term embodies the unrealistic expectations of magazines/society/men when it comes to mothers. Magical Mummy can cook, clean, do arts and crafts with the kiddies, sew, wash, walk the dog and fuck like a pornstar without even ruffling her perfect hair. She is never to be found languishing on the sofa whilst the kids run riot, nor does she drink wine and sob in the evenings, looking at the pile of ironing and wondering what the fuck happened to her life.

Most men will claim to their wives (in a foolish attempt to create their prefect world) that their own mothers attained Magical Mummy status.
"He asked me why I hadn't been able to iron his uniform as well as make the dinner and clean the kitchen. As if I'm some kind of Magical Mummy!"

"I told him to piss off to his Magical Mummy, and let her run around like a twat for him"

"Make your own dinner, I'm busy doing this! I'm not your Magical Mummy!"
by MagickDio February 5, 2010
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McFuck

1) Horny teenage couples in their droves flock to McDonald's for cheap, disgusting "food" every weekend. Sometimes, dipping the fries in those nasty little ketchup tubs gets too sexually suggestive for them, and they head off to the toilets to bang each other. They think it's risque, but almost everyone in McDonald's has no soul and no shame; their faces are deeply buried in greasy, supersized crap, so they barely notice the kids sneaking off for a McFuck.

2) McDonald's employees that are shagging at work are "McFucking". Presumably, the experience of being "Mcfucked" would lead to some serious "McShame", but as afore mentioned, those that spend large amounts of time in McDonald's have no souls, or personalities for that matter.
"Shall we go to McDonald's and get a McChicken Sandwich? We could sneak off for a quick McFuck too, if you wanna?"

"Norman and Shirley were McFucking at the end of last night's shift. I only noticed because I'm new here and still could go to heaven"
by MagickDio March 7, 2010
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Pussy Locking

Like cock blocked, but for ladies. When something's coming at you, it can be blocked....hence cock blocking. When something is denied access, it's locked out, hence pussy locking. It's a frustrating state, because it's imposed by others.

Male BFF's are usually the biggest culprits for pussy locking their female friends, because they secretly fancy them, and don't want them fucking anyone else but them. Ex boyfriends can also create a pretty unbreakable pussy lock if you happen to be partying in the same venue.
"Hey Suze, great night last night wasn't it?"
"No, it wasn't. You kept pussy locking me! I never cock block you! Why do you keep doing this to me?"
"Because I love you......."
(shocked look of absolute disgust)
"........as a friend."
by MagickDio April 24, 2010
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Charity Orgasm

An orgasm which is given out of an uncomfortable sense of duty; much like parting with small change when confronted with a bucket shaking Salvation Army worker. You don't want to give it, but you'll be made to feel a total shit if you don't.

Here is a typical example of a circumstance that requires such a donation. Your partner has been moaning all the livelong day about their appearance. Words like "obese", "disgusting", "hideous" and "gross" have been used so often and so emphatically that, despite yourself, you genuinely begin to agree. Then the obligatory "You're so gorgeous, I can't keep my hands off you" sex that was meant to assure them they're hot has become an act of charity, with you performing deeds that you would rather not share with someone who has half convinced you they're a troll.
He closed his eyes and thought of Beyoncé whilst making his charity orgasm donation to his long term "fat", "rancid" and "skanky" girlfriend.
by MagickDio October 15, 2010
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Hit The High "C"

To Hit the high "C" is to make the high pitched noise emitted by a man who has just been injured in the genital area. It's a note easily achieved by choir boys and opera singers, but most men will only ever manage to attain such highs when they've sustained a blow to the bollocks.

To induce this noise in a gentleman, use reasonable force when striking the area. Note- REASONABLE force. Excessive force will result in no sound, as the note emitted will be too high for even dogs to hear, or he'll be unconscious, which is no fun for anyone.
"I accidentally elbowed Finn when I went to grab my handbag off the floor. He really hit the high "c", it was hard not to laugh"

"Ferdinand with a very good interception cleanly takes the ball away from Cissé. Now Gerrard comes dancing in like a fairy and oh! It's a kick to the balls from Ferdinand! And there's Gerrard, on his knees, having just hit the high "c""
by MagickDio March 3, 2010
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