333 definitions by Lorelili
(1515-1558) The fourth wife of Henry VIII. After the death of Jane Seymour, a new wife was sought for Henry, but his reputation preceded him; his main choices rejected him, making Anne of Cleves the front runner. The daughter of a German Duke, Anne was 24 when she married Henry in early 1540 but, unknown to her until later, Henry was repulsed by her. Described as pretty by everyone else, Henry (who was nearly fifty, obese, and had leg ulcers by then) said of his first sight of her "I like her not". Their introduction was a disaster, owing to mutual misunderstanding, beginning the marriage on a tenuous note.
After six months of marriage, Henry had the marriage annulled and offered to Anne property and estates in exchange that she remain in England. Initially devastated, Anne accepted and lived her days in wealth, answering to no man but to Henry, now as his "dear sister".
After six months of marriage, Henry had the marriage annulled and offered to Anne property and estates in exchange that she remain in England. Initially devastated, Anne accepted and lived her days in wealth, answering to no man but to Henry, now as his "dear sister".
Anne of Cleves was olive-skinned, unlike the pallid Jane Seymour, and lacked the sophistication of Katherine of Aragon and Anne Boleyn. Her unfamiliar German manners, exotic clothes, and German speech did not help matters. Henry, put off by her body, whined incessantly about how "ugly" that she was, suspecting that she wasn't a virgin, disregarding her sheltered upbringing and overprotective mother; at 24, Anne believed that a kiss from a man would make her pregnant.
Anne of Cleves, humiliated and hurt by the king, outlived Henry and his other wives, enjoyed the love of her stepchildren and her people, and died a contented woman.
Anne of Cleves, humiliated and hurt by the king, outlived Henry and his other wives, enjoyed the love of her stepchildren and her people, and died a contented woman.
by Lorelili January 4, 2011
AKA. Oral, Rectal, and Vaginal Pear.
A torture device shaped like a pear; had four segments which opened and closed at the turn of a screw at the top, like a flower opening its petals.
This torture gadget was inserted into the mouths or heretics, blasphemers, disturbers of the peace...
Or into the rectums of people convicted of sodomy. Homosexual men were especially vulnerable to this...
Or into the vaginas of women convicted of adultery or "sexual realtionships with Satan".
Often, the ends of the pear's segments were fitted with sharp tines, designed to rip into the throat, intestines, or cervix.
What ever cavity that the pear entered would face a range of things, from a slight expansion of the pear's segments and discomfort for the victim, up to total expansion and unrepairable (and very painful) mutilation of the cavity.
A torture device shaped like a pear; had four segments which opened and closed at the turn of a screw at the top, like a flower opening its petals.
This torture gadget was inserted into the mouths or heretics, blasphemers, disturbers of the peace...
Or into the rectums of people convicted of sodomy. Homosexual men were especially vulnerable to this...
Or into the vaginas of women convicted of adultery or "sexual realtionships with Satan".
Often, the ends of the pear's segments were fitted with sharp tines, designed to rip into the throat, intestines, or cervix.
What ever cavity that the pear entered would face a range of things, from a slight expansion of the pear's segments and discomfort for the victim, up to total expansion and unrepairable (and very painful) mutilation of the cavity.
by Lorelili March 25, 2005
1. Holding the power, status, and authority of a monarch: a hereditary leader of a country.
2. Of or relating to people of royal rank and their families, collectively.
3. Informally used to describe entertainers whose offspring at least try to follow in their parents' footsteps; some succeed and some don't, but this "royalty" is merely entertainment and they generally bear little political power outside of voicing their own opinions.
2. Of or relating to people of royal rank and their families, collectively.
3. Informally used to describe entertainers whose offspring at least try to follow in their parents' footsteps; some succeed and some don't, but this "royalty" is merely entertainment and they generally bear little political power outside of voicing their own opinions.
Many nobles across the land were related by blood or marriage to royalty... and many of them wanted the crown, ready to walk over anybody to capture it.
Many peasant women cunningly sought flings with the king, establishing a link with royalty through their children... and very well could have kept the royal family healthier by giving them a more diverse genepool.
Liza Minnelli, Janet Jackson, Moon Unit Zappa, Drew Barrymore, and Miley Cyrus are a few members of entertainment royalty.
Many peasant women cunningly sought flings with the king, establishing a link with royalty through their children... and very well could have kept the royal family healthier by giving them a more diverse genepool.
Liza Minnelli, Janet Jackson, Moon Unit Zappa, Drew Barrymore, and Miley Cyrus are a few members of entertainment royalty.
by Lorelili January 17, 2011
A pathetic excuse for a human, much less for an aristocrat. A scrawny, towheaded, false-tanned, attention-grabbing imbecile who defecates all over her dignity in order to be noticed.
A vapid run-of-the mill dyed-blonde bimbo who can't even speak her own language properly, is famous simply for her family's money and for her sex-life (as well as for her so-called "beauty"), has not done a thing to earn her fame and does not deserve a penny of her fortune.
A failed abortion/miscarriage who gulps and bathes in the semen of the pitifully desperate males who find her attractive enough to screw, has no respect for herself (much less for those of lower social status), is an absolute redneck, and can insert a redwood log into her gaping vagina.
A vapid run-of-the mill dyed-blonde bimbo who can't even speak her own language properly, is famous simply for her family's money and for her sex-life (as well as for her so-called "beauty"), has not done a thing to earn her fame and does not deserve a penny of her fortune.
A failed abortion/miscarriage who gulps and bathes in the semen of the pitifully desperate males who find her attractive enough to screw, has no respect for herself (much less for those of lower social status), is an absolute redneck, and can insert a redwood log into her gaping vagina.
And those who claim that Paris Hilton's detractors are "gelous/jalous/jellous" (the correct spelling being "jealous"), what is there to be jealous of? This mooching slut has money and "fame", yes, but where is her talent? Where is her dignity? Where is her intellect? She has none of these.
by Lorelili November 12, 2006
1. A girl or unmarried young woman. A maiden.
2. An abbreviation of maidservant or handmaiden: a female servant who cleans the house and waits on you.
2. An abbreviation of maidservant or handmaiden: a female servant who cleans the house and waits on you.
1. The bride, a fair maid sixteen years of age, stood veiled beside a groom a decade older than her whom she had never met.
2. The lady of the manor ordered two maids to stop chatting and return to work.
2. The lady of the manor ordered two maids to stop chatting and return to work.
by Lorelili October 17, 2010
by Lorelili March 4, 2011
Translated litereally from French, "Fat Tuesday", this "holiday" has obscured origins and is now a marvolous excuse to march down the streets, to wear bright, often clashing, colors, to smash down the barriers of "heterosexuality" and "homosexuality" and to go crazy, drinking, streaking, and "playing" with whoever you want
From WLIIA: "I want yo uto do this scene like you're college girls going crazy at a Mardi Gras... action!"
by Lorelili October 23, 2004