14 definitions by Lajopi 292

An insult used by police officers from one station in central London, to describe a person who is completely obnoxious, irritating, incompetent or just plain stupid to such a degree it's funny, can be a member of the public or a colleague, usually a senior officer. Its use is mainly limited to one police station, but is starting to spread
"did you hear that bloke I nicked, saying he was going to get me sacked 'cos his uncle's a barrister?"

"yeah, what an utter fuckin crack spastic!"
by Lajopi 292 August 9, 2007
Get the crack spastic mug.
Anyone, gay or straight, who is obsessed with anal sex and constantly takes their obsession to new heights.
"Why are you walking like that?"

"My new man's a real Kak Pipe Cosmonaut"
by Lajopi 292 February 26, 2008
Get the Kak Pipe Cosmonaut mug.
Something sailors in the Royal Navy have sex with, if they're too lazy to wank
I woke up with a Wren this morning, she looked like meatloaf. Ug.
by Lajopi 292 August 9, 2007
Get the Wren mug.
Do you remember the Mod Plod beating those peace protestors at Greenham Common? Good work fellas...
by Lajopi 292 August 9, 2007
Get the Mod Plod mug.
Folks employed in the industry who live a hedonistic and fun loving lifetsyle who's nights are full of trashy antics, drunken shenanigans and wild fornicating, but by day appear top be respectable dive instructors. Usially a dive master or instructor.
Tourist "I've paid $5000 dollars for a week in cayman, and there's an unconscious drunkard laying naked on my balcony"

Concierge "apologies ma'am, that'll be some dive trash"
by Lajopi 292 August 18, 2008
Get the Dive Trash mug.
British Royal Navy term for the withdrawal method of contraception, Fratton being the last railway station before arriving in Portsmouth, which is the end of the line.
Matelot 1: "Firkin 'ell mate, that's a right swamp donkey you've pulled, do you need a condom"

Matelot 2: "no mate, I'm getting off at Fratton"
by Lajopi 292 August 18, 2008
Get the Getting off at Fratton mug.
A hopefully mythical sexual act/prank where an unsuspecting tourist is flown from Vegas into the desert aboard a pink helicopter then forced to sit astride a cactus with their bare bottoms. Footage of such incidents may later appear on the internet. Also known as 'Sugdens Delight'
"Hey dude I haven't seen you sit down since Dawson's stag night"

"Yeah, we went to vegas and I got drunk and did the Nevada Spike Shooter, they operate next week"
by Lajopi 292 February 14, 2009
Get the Nevada Spike Shooter mug.