53 definitions by Lârry Dângüs, esq.

When a person who is supposed to be following the keto diet cheats and goes over their daily carb/sugar limit, their metabolic state goes from ketosis to cheatosis. Go take a dildo shit, motherfucker.
What's with the donuts, Bob? I thought you were on the keto diet.

Bob: Yeah well, now it's a cheato diet.
by Lârry Dângüs, esq. February 23, 2019
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The practice of mixing odd flavors in the mouth simultaneously. Some examples of multitasting include eating a piece of citrus fruit too soon after brushing one's teeth, taking a hit off a beer while also chewing gum, or sucking on a breath mint while eating a wasabi-laden sushi roll.

While it is most often a manifestation of absent-mindedness, multitasting has also been deliberately practiced by people who 'just don't give a fuck.' These brave intentional multitasters have inspired humanity for generations innumerable. Kneel before Zod!
Did you see that chick? She just popped a piece of gum in her mouth, chewed it like three times, and then downed half a diet soda. And now...I think...yes!...she's back to chewing the gum! What is this fucktardation?

That's called multitasting, and it is rather odd. But did you know that both the chewing gum and the soda contain a chemical poison called aspartame, which should never have been approved by the FDA?

No, do tell!

Well, it just so happens that Aspartame was passed despite FDA scientists' disapproval by none other than douche nozzle extraordinaire, Donald Rumsfeld.

According to a G.D. Searle's salesperson, Patty WoodAllott, Donald Rumsfeld stated "he would call in all his markers and that no matter what, he would see to it that aspartame be approved this year."

An interview with consumer attorney Jim Turner revealed how Donald Rumsfeld "called in his markers" as part of Reagan's transition team in 1981. This is why G.D. Searle felt compelled to reapply for aspartame's approval one day after Reagan's inauguration.

This is despite rejection of aspartame over brain tumors.

What a bunch of sweethearts, huh? I wish asshats Rumsfeld and that stupid band 311 would all go die in a fire.
by Lârry Dângüs, esq. May 23, 2010
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Alternate term for the Subaru Outback.

The Outback is very popular with lesbian couples, particularly in mountainous regions.
My straight friend just purchased herself a Subaru Outback.
The lezbo limo sometimes appeals to the straights as well.
by Lârry Dângüs, esq. November 6, 2021
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The elongated version of a human scrotum which appears in searing hot weather conditions.
I just did a video search on the word nekkade and witnessed a ridiculous summer length sack. Why was that guy riding his bike in the nude?
by Lârry Dângüs, esq. May 4, 2010
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Jacking off in front of a minor, as Rudy Giuliani did in the second Borat movie.
"I was just tucking my shirt in", claimed Rudolph, while smelling his own fingers.
by Lârry Dângüs, esq. October 23, 2020
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This term refers to the part of one's bowel movement that has been transformed inside the guts from cheese into a harder-than-usual portion of doo-doo. One might be in the ecstatic throes of a smooth dookie session, only to have the brown train interrupted by a cheese plug. One antidote to the cheese plug is binge drinking.
Say man, why do you scarf handfuls of mozzarella every time we make pizza? Nahmean like, how you gonna deal with the cheese plug?

Not to worry, I'll be taking 30 dextromethorphan hydrobromide cough gels immediately after dinner. The resulting shits delivered by those things will blow out any cheese plug.
by Lârry Dângüs, esq. August 13, 2010
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This term refers to a baby-sized penis which is located on the crotch of a full-grown man.

Most of the major military conflicts in recorded history can probably be blamed on the occurrence of the crotch nipple. There are many crotch nipples in the world, and they are all due to mindless cruelty on the part of God, who does not actually exist.

This term was first coined by hecKtor Dangus in 1991 upon his first viewing of a videotaped performance by GG Allin, for reasons which are readily apparent to anyone who has ever seen GG in the nude.
Confucius say, "man with crotch nipple much more likely to join Marines".

If a man with a crotch nipple were to play his cards right at the dyke bar, he might get lucky with a lipstick lesbian who has a penchant for large clitori.
by Lârry Dângüs, esq. July 14, 2010
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