Joniquai's definitions

nob sneeze

male ejaculation. especially thick, male ejaculation.

1.oh shit, i'm gonna nob sneeze!

2.she still had the remains of last night's nob sneeze in her hair.

3.i am about to sneeze on your face.

by Joniquai March 20, 2005

Cactuses

The correct way to addess two or more cactus plants. Addressing them as cacti is no longer acceptable as upon hearing this the cactuses feel unloved; cactuses like to be treated as individuals.

Please go and stroke my cactuses for me

by Joniquai January 5, 2004

C-Unit

Alternative to calling someone a cunt.

You stupid fucking C-Unit.

I wanna fuck you up your C-Unit

Man, she has one tasty C-Unit

Her C-Unit needs a good scrub

by Joniquai January 5, 2004

beef and beer

Tasty Beef, Beer of your choice and a whole bunch of happiness for under £3.

Barmaid: "How can I help you?"

Punter: "Beef and Beer"

Barmaid: "That's £2.99 please"

Punter: (Nods knowingly) "Safe"

by Joniquai February 10, 2004

wanker's length

1.An arbitary unit of measurement, defined as the maximum length of toilet paper used when cleaning ones spunk from the carpet (8 sheets).

2.Used as an insult, meaning you are toilet paper covered in nob sneeze.

1. I was literally a wanker's length from getting the bus.

2. He was really tall, about one and a half wanker's lengths.

3.It is about a 200 wanker's length walk to the shops.

4.You fucking dumb wanker's length.

by Joniquai March 20, 2005

gimpery

Gimpery is to Gimps as Buggery is to randy little Buggers.

You boy, stop that gimpery post-haste.

by Joniquai January 5, 2004

Playground

Place to go and pick up a younger bird.

You coming down the playground in a bit, dean, to pick up some fifteen year olds?

by Joniquai January 5, 2004