2 definitions by John W. Cornett

Top Definition
(see also optirectumitus)
Chronic pessimism of a particularly severe nature. Derived from opti-rectum-itis as follows:

opti: having to do with optics, visual or eyes

rectum: the innermost and center between the gluteus maximus, the primary source of shitstains and buttnuggets; butthole; fecal exit, excremental departure zone.

itis: an inflammatory disease

FACTS: When hyper-signals originating in the optical and rectal regions of the human anatomy cross at certain points and become snared and start to resonate at unusually high amplitudes, the associated neuro- transmitters merge and the combined signals release an evolutionary combination of fecal-optical gases which then propogate directly to the frontal cortex of the brain. When the fecal-optical gases settle, an unsuspecting victim will often become pissy, negative, impatient and, generally, will exhibit symtoms of being a total scumbag schmegma breath.. especially around trusted friends and family!

General Symtom: A shitty outlook on life.
Don't mess with John today. He is very discontented and angry. His misfortunes and blunders combined with the span of time since his last blowjob, have resulted in a severe case of optirectumitis.
by John W. Cornett December 03, 2007
op-ti-rec-tum-it-us, noun,

1. An ambiguious mental condition which manifests itself by outbursts of negative thinking and behaviours. Experts have hypothesized that the condition peaks whenever neuro-transmitters from the optic nerve cross the path traveled by transmitters from the nerves of the anus or other rectal areas. The most commonly observed symptom is an obvious disposition by the sufferer that includes a severely excremental outlook (shitty-outlook) on life and living.

2. Negative thinking; hopelessness.
Johnny thinks his life is over. He is obviously suffering from a bad case of optirectumitus.
by John W. Cornett June 10, 2006

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