This is the shit that Proactiv put me through
2 weeks just to get "the package"
10 fucking minutes just to finish the "3 Steps"
The "3 Steps" are complicated as fuck
I have to apply the fucking treatment TWICE a dah
Dry ass skin
Green Tea Moisturizer doesn´t do shit
1 whole month just to get results
The people who try to sell you Proactiv on the phone try to sell you way too many shit
Proactiv has shit for every single thing(WHY CANT YOU JUST MAKE FUCKING SIMPLE ACNE TREATMENT THAT ALL COMES IN ONE BOTTLE?)
They sent me some "magic pills" called Vitaclear which turned my piss bright yellow
Sometimes I get lazy when I´m using Proactiv because of all the shit mentioned above
Was it worth it? Fuck no. Did I get results? Yes, but it took too long to get results. Is it worth buying? Only if you´re desperate to get rid of acne. I think it´s overrated and customers don´t tell Proactiv all the shit it puts them through. But hey, at least my acne is gone(for now)
*J is watching TV*
Commercial Announcer: Clear skin is sexy skin. Buy Proactiv now!
*J gets up to look at the mirror*
J sees his utterly disgusting acne
J: Damn I need to order that shit!
2 weeks later
J: Finally no more asshole acne!
3 days later
J: AHH MY FACE IS FUCKING DRY AND IT BURNS AHHH! I NEED TO WASH THIS SHIT OFF!
J takes a break from using Proactiv for 3 days
3 weeks later
J: Damn look at my skin! All that´s left is acne scars. Apparalenty Proactiv has something for that too...
The guy with the TV show that many of us used to watch as a little kid. At times he´s a bit weird, but he definitely gets all the women.
J: Holy shit Mr. Rogers! I love you man. No gay shit!
Mr. Rogers: Nice to see that the kids give me appreciation. Oh pardon me...one of my wives just called me...
Mr. Rogers answers the phone
J(thinking to himself): Mr. Rogers is my hero
To do start doing something that has been popular amongst people for quite a while.
J: Hey Ronald it´s about time you´re getting a phone!
Ronald: Yeah I´m really excited!
J: Cool story bro. What phone are you getting?
Ronald: Hmm...maybe an iPhone...
Ronald: Because everyone has it!
J: Not really. There are many other phones to buy and you choose that because "everyone has it"? You are such a fucking follower...!
1. Someone who is scared to use profanity
2. Someone who doesn´t feel comfortable with using profanity
3. Someone who doesn´t use profanity on a regular basis
4. Someone who never used profanity
5. Someone who references "bad words", like fuck, as the F-word
6. Someone who thinks the words like "damn" and "ass" are "bad words"
Nigga (fo´ shigga)
Hey look, I used profanity you Profanity Pussy
Basically it means to have racist feelings to other ethnicities but not show it to ANYONE at all. This may lead to arguments with 2 people of a different race, but not necessarily about racism, although that is the reason why they´re arguing
Two forms of inner-racism are
A. To stereotype someone. YES THIS IS INNER-RACISM.
B. To be afraid of a specific ethnic group.
Tj (thinking to himself): I bet this white boy is gonna say something corny
Tj: Hey Bill, what´s up?
Bill: The sky?
Tj: Uh huh...
Tj (thinking to himself): Of course
Bill: Are you hungry?
Tj: Yeah bro
Bill (thinking to himself): I bet he wants some KFC
Bill: How about some KFC?
Bob arrives in Puerto Rico via plane.
Bob looks at the Puerto Rican natives.
Bob (thinking to himself): These people need to be "Americanized". These traditions are stupid
Juan, a Puerto Rican, watches Bob uneasily
Juan (thinking to himself): Look at that fucking American. Imperialist bastard!
Coincidently, Juan and Bob are working on a project together. All is friendly on the outside, but in the inside, they just fucking hate eachother.
Let´s be honest everyone has inner-racism
Basically a phrase meant to piss people off. If you think about it, many words can fit between "U" and "BRO?", with the most common outcome of "UMADBRO?", indeed one of the most annoying phrases in history. Women may be offended by this, most likely due because they are not male, however if you ask something like say "UMADSIS?" it just wouldn´t sound right. Be advised to use "BRO?" instead of "SIS?" to prevent yourself from looking like a total dickhead.
John smells something coming from the bathroom. He knocks on the door.
Sarah: I´ll be out in a minute!
Sarah: What the fuck?!
Mike: The only thing left to watch is Jersey Shore
John: Uh huh
Mike: I got to admit Pauly is cute
Liz: My dog died
John: Feel sorry for ya
Liz starts crying.
Try to make up your own combinations with U‹Insert word(s)›BRO?, but use it in appropiate situations, like the ones above.
An attractive woman who´s physical appearence is
*Not a shitload of time spent on hair
*No make-up (lipstick not included)
*A-C cup (D cup means the woman had some work done on her milk glands)
*No abs (abs are utterly disgusting on a woman´s belly, I don´t know why you women think guys think abs are attractive)
*Not "Paris Hilton skinny"
*Not fat. Ok fine, maybe a tiny amount of fat. Thats it.
*Medium-Large Ass. (Not too large or it will be assumed that work has been done on it.)
*Somewhat thicker legs. Not fat bitch legs.
*Small feet (Compared to a man´s feet)
You know the story of Adam and Eve? Look at a pic of Eve fully naked. That is what a woman is supposed to look like. All natural and beautiful. Not those skinny tramps over in Hollywood.