Grinning Cat's definitions

serial monogamy

The custom or practice of having one mate at a time. Each relationship may be serious and committed, or not. The term is used in contrast with strict "monogamy", which can imply just one partner over a lifetime.

Not to be confused with cereal monogamy.

People who remarry (and who have exclusive relationships, and who don't cheat) are practicing serial monogamy.

by Grinning Cat January 19, 2015

pence

(v.) to avoid answering a question, as exemplified by Indiana Governor Mike Pence in his interview on "This Week" on March 29, 2015, about the broad "religious freedom" bill he signed.

Examples of pencing:

George Stephanopoulos: "Yes or no: If a florist in Indiana refuses to serve a gay couple at their wedding, is that legal now in Indiana?"
Mike Pence: "George, this is where this debate has gone."

"Is that true or not?"
"George, look, the issue here is that, y'know..."

"Yes or no: should it be legal to discriminate against gays and lesbians?"
"George, you're following the mantra of the last week online, and you're trying to make the issue about something else."

by Grinning Cat April 1, 2015

Dominator Culture

A model of culture and human relations based on hierarchy, ranking, power, and control. Masculinity is equated with control, conquest, and violence: men dominating women and children.

Opposite to Partnership Culture.

In a domination system...

Humans are flawed and dangerous.

Difference is equated with superiority or inferiority.

Power is used to control and destroy through hierarchies of domination.

Competition means "dog eat dog"; "every man for himself".

People cooperate to dominate others.

Huge gaps between haves and have-nots

Nature is a resource to be dominated, depleted and polluted.

Morality of insensitivity, control, and coercion.

(Based on the Center for Partnership Studies' summary of points from Riane Eisler's _The Power of Partnership_ and David Korten's _The Great Turning_)

Dominator culture teaches all of us that the core of our identity is defined by the will to dominate and control others. We are taught that this will to dominate is more biologically hardwired in males than in females. In actuality, dominator culture teaches us that we are all natural-born killers but that males are more able to realize the predator role. In the dominator model the pursuit of external power, the ability to manipulate and control others, is what matters most. When culture is based on a dominator model, not only will it be violent but it will frame all relationships as power struggles.
(bell hooks)

by Grinning Cat March 28, 2013

man box

The rules for "acting like a man"; the mentality, behaviors and restrictions that many men and boys are socialized to conform to. These tenets of the "cult of masculinity" are both symptoms and enablers of Dominator Culture. They can be so pervasive as to be almost invisible; yet they lead men to disrespect, mistreat, and abuse women and each other.

---
THE MAN BOX

Demonstrate power/control (especially over women)

Aggression - Dominance - yell - intimidate

Do not cry openly or express emotions (except for anger)

Do not express weakness or fear - "take it"

Don't back down - don't make mistakes

Do not be "like a woman"

Heterosexual

Have lots of sex with women - "conquests"

Do not be "like a gay man"

Tough/Athletic/Competitive/Strength/Courage

Make Decisions - Never ask for help

Women viewed as property/objects (especially sexual objects)
---

(Based largely on Tony Porter's TED talk "A Call to Men")

This is the love of my life, my daughter Jay. The world I envision for her -- how do I want men to be acting and behaving? ... I need you working with me and me working with you on how we raise our sons and teach them to be men -- that it's okay to not be dominating, that it's okay to have feelings and emotions, that it's okay to promote equality, that it's okay to have women who are just friends and that's it, that it's okay to be whole, that my liberation as a man is tied to your liberation as a woman.

I remember asking a nine-year-old boy ... "What would life be like for you, if you didn't have to adhere to this man box?" He said to me, "I would be free."

by Grinning Cat March 28, 2013

IRS

"Infernal Revenue Service", how many Americans feel about the Internal Revenue Service, the U.S. federal tax collection agency.

Legend has it that IRS employees scrutinize handwritten envelopes containing tax returns, and any addressed to the "Infernal" Revenue Service are flagged for audits.

by Grinning Cat April 18, 2008

anticronym

Another name for "RAS syndrome" (short for Redundant Acronym Syndrome syndrome) -- redundantly using a word in connection with an acronym or initialism that already contains the word. "ATM machine" is an example: the phrase literally refers to an "Automatic Teller Machine machine".

Enter your PIN number when the ATM machine prompts for it on the LCD display.
(That sentence contains several anticronyms.)

by Grinning Cat January 6, 2015

Thinkering

Getting down on one knee, curling one's wrist to one's chin, and looking up, mimicking the pose of Auguste Rodin's classic sculpture "The Thinker".

(Created by Dave Silverman, reported by Staks Rosch, "Thinkering: The atheist answer to Tebowing", Dec. 30, 2011, examiner.com)

In response to the fundamentalist craze of Tebowing, American Atheists President Dave Silverman has come up with an atheist version called "Thinkering."
Someone commented that the pose looked too similar to Tebowing, to which Silverman responded: "That's the point. The difference is we don't bow our heads in blind submission, rather we consider and conclude for ourselves."

by Grinning Cat March 10, 2012