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Fearman's definitions

Tarot cards

Intriguing form of folk art consisting typically of a deck of cards with 22 major trumps and four suits of minor trumps with fourteen cards each, although there are variations on this basic plan. Typically or ideally each card has an illustration of some kind. The variety of decks is considerable, although some are considerably more original in their inspiration (and/or better in their artistry) than others. Poetically resonant and often of use in artistic inspiration. Thought to have originated at least as far back as the late Middle Ages. Sadly done to death by New Agers who insist they are useful for divination, and Christian fundamentalists who put them close to the top of a veeerrry looonnngg list of stuff that will lead you straight to Hell, but still quite interesting.
Wanna see my collection of Tarot cards? I've got about thirty decks.
by Fearman October 1, 2007
mugGet the Tarot cardsmug.

Timothy Treadwell

Born Timothy Dexter. Classic narcissist. Reformed alcoholic and drug addict, might not have entirely straightened out. Claimed, without verification, to have been the theoretical second choice for the role of Woody Harrelson's character, "Woody" Boyd, in Cheers. Became a wacky pseudo-environmentalist wingnutscrewballsup who travelled to Alaska from round about 1990 to his death in 2003 to try to get ... close to ... bears. Documented his exploits on videocam, some of said footage making the guts of Werner Hertzog's biopic "Grizzly Man". Ended up doing a Michael Jackson impression over steaming bear shit. Came to believe he was the bears' last good hope, and started ranting on-camera against the wildlife service, humanity in general, et cetera.

In the autumn of 2003 he tried heading back south to be with his family or other friends; at the airport he got into a towering rage with somebody and failed to board the plane, instead returning to the Alaskan lake shore where he had spent the summer. Unfortunately and despite his assumed name, in so doing he didn't tread very well at all. In the meantime his favourite bear clan had all gone into hibernation and another group had moved in to time-share the place, where a few weeks later Treadwell was reminded of the six basic relationships an animal species may have with other animals in the wild: you ignore it, it picks off your parasites, you pick off its parasites, you fuck it, you eat it, it eats you. This list included the last option, and unfortunately he had taken his latest girlfriend along for the ride as well. After the bears had dined on long pig to their hearts' content the park rangers arrived to collect the leftovers and shoot the bears.

Living proof (better still, dead proof) that you shouldn't believe everything you see on Walt Disney movies.
I wanted to be an eco-warrior when I was younger, but then I heard about Timothy Treadwell and wizened up.
by Fearman April 1, 2008
mugGet the Timothy Treadwellmug.

spherical asshole

A complete asshole. An utter waste of chromosomes. Spherical because a complete asshole has no redeeming features whatsoever and is still an asshole no matter which way you look at him/her, just as a sphere presents the same circular outline no matter which direction it is viewed from.
He may have been a junkie for ten years and trashed all his friends, but even when he's gone cold turkey don't expect him to say sorry. He's a spherical asshole.
by Fearman November 11, 2007
mugGet the spherical assholemug.

apostrophe catastrophe

The term apostrophe catastrophe denotes incorrect use or non-use of the apostrophe (') in a sentence.
Examples of apostrophe catastrophes:

We sell carrot's, parsnip's and potatoe's.

Its going to rain.

Johns coat and Marias bag were left on the train.

He grabbed the cat and started playing with it's tail.
by Fearman March 31, 2008
mugGet the apostrophe catastrophemug.

see ya, don't want to be ya

Affected humorous goodbye to someone the speaker can't stand. The bit before the comma is spoken out loud, the rest is more sotto voce; the whole phrase may be repeated straight out to a third party.
Yeah, fine, Travis, whatever you say, love the jacket, see ya, don't want to be ya.
by Fearman March 4, 2008
mugGet the see ya, don't want to be yamug.

boghole

1. The anus.

2. A toilet.

3. A hole in the surface of a bog. If you fall in a boghole you are liable to slide down into darkness and gunge and never come out again until someone cuts fuel in another fifty thousand years and ends up contacting an archaeologist.

4. In Ireland and perhaps elsewhere on the fringes of Europe or Canada, one of the most Godawful places you are ever likely to find yourself in. A tiny and usually misleading hint of civilisation in the middle of an endless brown or green but really grey landscape. Was probably so much nicer and more atmospheric before they decided to build houses. Typically used as a rest stop on a long bus journey for that very reason; people are less likely to get lost looking at the sights (because there are none) and forget they've got to catch the bus. If you grow up in a boghole, either you have an IQ of 2 or you have only one burning ambition in life from the cradle, and that is to get as far away from the boghole as you can, as soon as possible.
She's gone to use the boghole again.

Oh, no, don't tell me little Sammy's gone for a walk and slipped and fallen down the boghole!

I grew up in Ballygronan. For me, the symbol of the promise held by the rest of the world was a tree growing on a nearby hilltop. Man, what a boghole.
by Fearman March 4, 2008
mugGet the bogholemug.

now a minor motion picture

Now a minor motion picture: a blurb I have yet to see on a book cover. Have you?
How to Rationalise Telling Sam She was Akin to a Dead Mouse in a Latrine in Swahili, by R.A.K. Martin-Smythe. Now a minor motion picture from the Confrere Brothers.
by Fearman May 30, 2008
mugGet the now a minor motion picturemug.

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