337 definitions by Fearman

People for the Ethical Treatment of Animals (if you ask them), or maybe Pusillanimous Egregious Terrorist Assholes. In cahoots with (or is an alternative front for) the Animal Liberation Front, or ALF. (Assholes Live Forever?)

An extremist organisation on at least the same plane as the various stripes of frankenfearmongers. They are against the use of animals in medical experimentation ... until they get seriously sick themselves, when the use of medicines tested on animals is suddenly AOK. (To take just one example, the organisation's vice-president Mary Beth Sweetland is diabetic and has no problem taking insulin, thereby knowingly using a technology already tested on dogs and rodents. Check it out.) In the name of the rights of animals being raised on fur farms for their pelts they will often set said creatures "free" ... without a moment's thought for either the safety of the "liberated" creatures after a lifetime being tended in a cage, or their impact on the local environment. They have no objection to firebombing anyone they don't believe loves animals as much as they do, or indeed booby-trapping the cars said people drive. They howl at dog pounds and other such for euthanasing animals, while their own organisation is much given to doing the same to the beasties it takes into "care". They terrorise anyone they like without bothering to so much as debate with them or wish them the time of day ... but just wait for one of these "animal-loving" parasites to end up under a cop's baton and listen to them howl about their civil rights. Obviously someone forgot to tell them when they were growing up that deeply unhip old maxim that rights come with responsibilities.

PETA supporters think it's cool that lions chase down wildebeest on the grasslands of Africa, although obviously that's gonna change when they all become citizens with full rights ... a farmer shooting rabbits that are coming for his lettuce, on the other hand, is the spawn of Satan. They enjoy comparing farms to Nazi death camps. I'm sure that goes down a treat with all those Jews, gays and other such folk out there. PETA consists of a rabble of mentally unstable adolescents along with an upper crust of ageing hippies and a few celebrities, at least some of whom should, one would think, be older and wiser. One of their members, model Joanna Krupa, has claimed she'd rather go naked than wear fur ... that makes two of us, darling. You first.

Best thing to do with them is to drop them into a pit full of hungry lions and see how many articles of their manifesto they manage to recite before they have an educational experience.
Might I suggest that PETA finds a better way of loving animals than hating humans?
by Fearman December 08, 2007
A tautology is a reiteration of a term using one or more different successive synonyms.
Examples of tautology:

It was a wet rainy day with lots of precipitation.
She is a female woman of the opposite sex, John.
We could see some dilapidated ruins.
by Fearman December 03, 2007
1. The HAL-9000 computer, guardian of the spacecraft Discovery in the novels and films of 2001: A Space Odyssey and its sequel, 2010. First activated at the HAL plant in Urbana, Illinois on January 12, 1997 (or 1992 in the film version). HAL is short for Heuristic ALgorithmic, and not derived by moving one letter back from the initials of IBM, as some have suggested. HAL's apparently psychotic behaviour in 2001 is revealed in the novel, and in either version of 2010, to have been a result of a neurosis arising from conflicts between his programming to accurately input, analyse and output information, and the demands of national security mandated by the Pentagon.

2. Any troublesome, wary or otherwise bloody-mindedly unhelpful computer.
Open the pod bay doors, Hal.
by Fearman February 20, 2008
Excruciating shite by Baz Luhrmann. Ought to be covered by the Geneva Convention.
Moulin Rouge. Non Merci.
by Fearman August 03, 2007
Pseudoscientific diagnosis most often made of people by their narcissistic parents, in conjunction with airheaded social workers, so that the parents don't have to accept personal responsibility for ten to twenty years of filling the kid's head full of dysfunctional bullshit. Also useful, in our age of postmodernist relativism where science is seen as at once useful and deeply suspect, for purposes of claiming financial aid. The kids could probably do with the aid, but society doesn't need the quackery. Those who make a mint out of selling the notion of this condition often rope in a few undeniable autistic savants to their argument so as to confer a thin veneer of respectability on the whole enterprise.

Incidentally, the very use of the word syndrome is pseudoscientific when used in the field of psychiatry. In medicine or any real science, a syndrome is defined as a wide range of symptoms, not all of which may be present in any one patient, which can be proven to link back to a common cause. To take two examples: Down's Syndrome results from a doubling of the sex-linked X chromosome in a person's genotype. It manifests in a range of symptoms including a flattened facial structure, a slant to the eyes, above average muscular development and below average intelligence, not all of which will necessarily manifest in any one person with the syndrome. Likewise, Acquired Immune Deficiency Syndrome, or AIDS, manifests in any of a large number of otherwise usually rare opportunistic infections once the body's immune system has been disabled by the Human Immunodeficiency Virus (HIV). Again, not all of these show up in any one case; again, there is a common underlying cause.

After decades of research, psychiatrists remain divided on how the human mind works. There are various conflicting schools of thought (Freudians, Jungians, Adlerians, gestalt therapists, a plethora of others); beyond some empirical research on brain chemistry, neural functioning and other areas related to hard science, the teaching on the workings of the mind get rather hazy rather fast. In other words, we don't really know for certain how the mind works in the sort of detail that would enable us to talk about "common origins" for the extremely wide range of symptoms allegedly linked to this so-called syndrome. The word "syndrome" is simply used in this case because the naive and misguided think it sounds impressively scientific. The very fact that the parameters of Asperger's are so broad and vague pretty much tells you what this whole racket is really about; selling people a bill of goods. However, in the majority of cases, given the plasticity of the human mind in early development and the lack of any explanation of how this "syndrome" is supposed to arise, the above definition is, I would offer, likely to be at least as good as any.
Johnny and Mary Stewart could never get their asses out of bed in the morning and Mary filled little Billy's head with nonsense about how the world is full of people out to get him. When he was bullied in school she told him to ignore it. Now she's gadding about telling everyone he has Asperger's Syndrome. Surprise surprise.
by Fearman June 27, 2007
Twentieth largest island on the planet. West of Great Britain. Home to Brendan Behan, U2 and the original Guinness brewery. Used to get most of the rain in Europe, now thankfully changing due to global warming, proving that it is an ill wind and all that. Exports include the above rock group, an above average slice (for the island's population) of the world's greatest writers, the above dark beverage with a creamy head on, oodles of women with unwanted pregnancies, a few deliveries of Semtex, milk, beef, and formerly, streams of missionaries. Currently is the grip of a "tiger economy" which doesn't seem so feline if you leave out the wobbly property market. Wouldn't be such a bad place if it wasn't for Limerick and a couple of places in the Six Counties.
Ireland. Last chance to make a will before the Atlantic.
by Fearman November 24, 2007
Game which is still winnable by remembering the admonition from a certain franchise starring Keanu Reeves: "There is no spoon."
You can't fool me with that knifey-spoony stuff.
by Fearman October 26, 2007

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