1065 definitions by Eaton Holgoode

When your girlfriend pulls your grandma's afghan (the crocheted wrap that's thrown over the back of the couch) over your lap and gives you a smooth, loving tug job during movie night.
Roger busted his nut all over the couch after his girlfriend gave him an Afghan Handy.
by Eaton Holgoode February 21, 2017
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A hot chick that is always DTF.
Dana is just pure Deli Ham. Imma get up in dat.
by Eaton Holgoode October 6, 2015
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A euphemistic expression regarding the extreme urgency to defecate and holding it in as much in as possible. Having the pressure of a fecal turd poking itself partially out of the bum hole while trying to make it to the closest restroom.
Roger sprinted down the hall from his desk to the restroom. He has a turtle peeking.
by Eaton Holgoode March 20, 2017
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The creamy amalgam of sperm and smegma. Formulated when a dude with a filthy, dick cheese riddle penis beats off and nuts all over his knob and froths it together.
My roommate left is nasty as cum rag on the couch. It was covered in dried spergma.

I really need to wash my glans more often. This smegma really makes a lot of spergma when I rub one out.
by Eaton Holgoode February 16, 2018
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A wipe job after a squeaky clean shit that is soft, smooth and requires only one pass of toilet paper thru the ass cheeks.
Thanks to his high fiber diet, Jerry always shits with confidence in knowing that he will always have squeaky clean drop followed by a Velvet Wipe.
by Eaton Holgoode February 27, 2015
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Standing in your kitchen eating French crepes while getting your ass eaten out.
I had just made myself some crepes when the next thing I knew my boxers were down and I was getting a European tickler.
by Eaton Holgoode December 10, 2018
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A deliciously and naturally sweet tasting, fluffy, puffy vagina.
Roger loves eating pussy. His latest girlfriend's snatch is so sweet, he refers to it as a slice of Box Cake.
by Eaton Holgoode May 11, 2015
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