Duckbutt's definitions

doesn't love the Lord and Southeastern Conference football

An ironic expression used by Southern males to express disbelief in or mild condemnation of some else's attitudes or behavior, supposedly drawing on some stereotypes of Southerners. (This expression possibly originated with Lewis Grizzard, a most excellent American humorist and commentator.)

Billy Bob eats strawberry Moon Pies and drinks Pepsi; only someone who doesn't love the Lord and Southeastern Conference football would do that.

by Duckbutt November 4, 2005

awdoc

An awdoc is a university student who discovers at about ninety percent of the way through a semester that he (rarely she) is making a poor grade and asks for some slack on the course grade or deadlines for term papers. Awdocs are so-called because of their characteristic distress call, "Aww Doc!"

Soon it will be Thanksgiving, and the awdocs will discover that time is running out for them. I must purchase two boxes of Puffs for them and replenish the Jack Daniel's for myself!

by Duckbutt September 30, 2005

douchebag index

The douchebag index (DBI) is a statistic that yields the number of days since a person last bathed. It is found by multiplying the number of visible tattoos (VT) by the number of missing teeth (MT).

DBI = VT X MT

This dude's douchebag index is 27, meaning that he hasn't bathed in about four weeks. He has nine gross tattoos and three missing teeth.

by Duckbutt January 9, 2008

pétomane syndrome

A minor behavior problem in which an individual, usually a preadolescent male, deliberately makes disgusting sounds for entertainment purposes. After Joseph Pujol, also known as Le Pétomane, a French entertainer.

Jonathan amused himself and his friends by making flatus-like sounds and generally manifesting the pétomane syndrome.

by Duckbutt February 10, 2006

superannuated flatus

Synonym for old fart.

Too many university faculty members wind up being superannuated flatuses over time. It's pasture time for them.

by Duckbutt November 20, 2005

dinosaur

A person who has been employed for a long time by a corporation, university, or organization. Generally used disparagingly by younger persons who regard this person as a general obstacle to progress, or one to their own personal advancement. The expression implies obsolescence on the part of the person so described, whether factually or not.

The English Department was filled with dinosaurs who were on the faculty for more than thirty years. They should set a maximum limit on the number of years a person may be on the faculty!

by Duckbutt November 19, 2006

clusterfuck trifecta

This is the perfect storm of government, in which there is simultaneous failure of all three levels of government: local, state, and federal.

The handling of the aftermath of Hurricane Katrina in New Orleans was a clusterfuck trifecta par excellence.

by Duckbutt July 26, 2006