Derick Nobcheese's definitions

southampton

A fucking shithole full of scummers, one of the worst places to live in the UK. They have a shit football team that are currently sitting at the bottom of the english premier league. The team is so shit that they had to steal local rivals manager and players. They are so shit that they couldn't hold a decent event. This year portsmouth is holding two big international events, one to celebrate the battle of trafalgar and the other is the international vestival of the sea. Southampton can only hold a shitty boat show each year. If you have chance to go to Southampton, don't go there. The only decent thing about Southampton is the option not to go there!!

To find Southampton on the map, look for the arse crack at the bottom of the UK, and follow it right to the shitty base. The you will see Southampton.

by Derick Nobcheese February 24, 2005

spasstard

Usually a person that floats around in the background and seems to hate anyone that has anything better than themselfs. This person usually looks retarded with larger than average sized head, funny eyes, so you can't tell if he looking at you or not, stupid BIG haircut and in the worse case scenario owns (or would like to own) a macintosh. This person won't get a job because he is scared of leaving his house. They are usually trekkies too. Anyone who say's anything indifferent to this persons' opinion is considered a twat, and should be cast away to never be seen again. This person also lies to people by saying he has "cancer" or "a member of the family has died", to try and win sympathy over them to get attention. They also think they are talented in there own field and if anyone is better they thinks it a person hatred towards them. They also have a very low personal hygiene and where the same clothes thoughout a week. Overall if you see anyone matching this discription stay clear of them because once you say hello to them or even noticing there existence, they will cling onto you like a quackpot and never leave you alone again.

Clive: Hay, (spasstard} I have bought a new AMD64 PC with 2GB broadband.

At this point spasstard is getting very pissed off and is picking up a knife.

Clive: Whats wrong mate?

Spasstard: You only bought that, because you know I only have a intel pentium 1 computer with windows 95.

Clive: No... I bought because I have a job and want to move on in life.

Spasstard: AAGGHH I hate you! You bastard!

Clive: Fuck Off you Spasstard.

by Derick Nobcheese October 1, 2004

scummers

Bunch of pricks from southampton. They usually dress in a red and white striped shirt.

Just look up southampton and you have your example of a scummer.

by Derick Nobcheese February 24, 2005

matrix

A kick ass film, with the best special effects.

wordFuck/word me the matrix is a good film!!

by derick nobcheese November 7, 2003

quackpot

A person that sticks to you like a annoying piece of shit that won't drop into the pan, even when you wiggle really hard. That you have to bounce on the toilet seat and clench your buttocks and open quick to hop fully let it go.

Derick: Sam fuck off why don't you!

Sam: What have I done?.......

Derick: Shagged my wife and sold the photo's on ebay©!!!

Sam: Can you forgive me?

Derick: FUCK off!!!

Sam: Go on...........

Derick: Fuck off you quackpot!!!!

by Derick Nobcheese August 24, 2004