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Cap'n Bullmoose's definitions

Rastus

The gentleman whose picture is on the Cream of Wheat box.
Rastus has had his picture on the Cream of Wheat box since the 1890s.
by Cap'n Bullmoose September 1, 2005
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zorch

That model airplane sure is zorch.
by Cap'n Bullmoose April 23, 2005
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bazooka

1. A goofy musical instrument played by Bob Burns in Spike Jones' orchestra in the 1940s.

2. A small anti-tank rocket launcher from World War II, named after Bob Burns' instrument.
Bob Burns played Bazooka for John Scott Trotter and Spike Jones.

GI Joe blasted the Kraut tank with his bazooka.
by Cap'n Bullmoose April 30, 2005
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Woof!

Word used by countless ignorant peckerwoods to refer to a wolf.
Hot damn, Lem, they's a Woof down there in the holler.
by Cap'n Bullmoose April 30, 2005
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homeless

A bum.
A wino.
A liberal word, used by effeminate liberals instead of the word "bum."
All good effeminate liberals call bums homeless. By doing this, they can can whine, "Oh, let's all help the homeless," just like the people of San Francisco. They said let's build homes and put all the homeless people inside them. Then nobody will be homeless. Ooh, aren't we good liberals? Barack O'Bama will love us!
So the liberals built homes. Then they went out on the streets and collected all the bums and put them in the homes. See, no more homeless!
Now, the San Francisco coppers have discovered that all those people on the streets who piss on the sidewalk and shit in the gutter and throw muscatel bottles on your front porch have addresses. They aren't homeless.
See, aren't those San Francisco liberals nice? They've spent over 100 million taxpayer dollars, but there are no more homeless people in San Francisco!
Just bums.
by Cap'n Bullmoose October 16, 2008
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stooge-o-matic transmission

An automotive transmission built for people who don't know how to shift gears, such as old granny ladies, mush wimps, effeminate males, soccer moms, and yuppie twits. This transmission has no clutch, and uses a torque converter.

People who don't know how to drive get stooge-o-matic transmissions, and therefore never learn how to drive. They put their brakes on for random cosmic events. They put their brakes on going down hills. You should see all the pantywaist stooge-o-matic drivers with burnt-out brakes on the roads in the Rocky Mountains!
Chalmers the mush wimp drives a sports car with a stooge-o-matic transmission.
by Cap'n Bullmoose April 20, 2005
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45

A phonograph record played at 45 RPM. It was about 8 inches across and had a very large central hole. It played a single song.
Peggy Sue has a whole box of Elvis 45s.
by Cap'n Bullmoose April 23, 2005
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