Cap'n Bullmoose's definitions
A relationship between one man and one woman. The nucleus of the family. Ordained by God and not by governments, and therefore not definable or controllable by governments.
Little children sometimes play amusing little games in which their puppy dogs and kitty cats get married. In a similar fashion, grown-up poofters and diesel dykes sometimes pretend that they can get married to each other. Strangely, all good liberal twits pretend the same thing.
Every poofter has the God-given right to get married. He can marry any willing single woman he wants to.
Every bull dyke has the God-given right to get married. She can marry any willing single man she wants to.
Little children sometimes play amusing little games in which their puppy dogs and kitty cats get married. In a similar fashion, grown-up poofters and diesel dykes sometimes pretend that they can get married to each other. Strangely, all good liberal twits pretend the same thing.
Every poofter has the God-given right to get married. He can marry any willing single woman he wants to.
Every bull dyke has the God-given right to get married. She can marry any willing single man she wants to.
by Cap'n Bullmoose April 30, 2005
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Get the step on a frog mug.A holiday celebrated by Italians in all major US cities. In Denver, white liberals whine and fuss, claiming the celebration is racist and genocidal.
Very strangely, in San Francisco, the white liberals don't dare to interfere with the Italians.
Very strangely, in San Francisco, the white liberals don't dare to interfere with the Italians.
by Cap'n Bullmoose May 14, 2005
Get the columbus day mug.A knob attached to the rim of a steering wheel that enables a driver to turn the wheel by moving the knob. Very common in the late 1940s and through the 1950s. Illegal in most places since then. Also called a nigger knob.
Ermal has a suicide knob on the steering wheel of his Case tractor. He decided to put one on the wheel of his Pontiac, too, so he could spoon with Ida Mae while he drives.
by Cap'n Bullmoose November 22, 2007
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Get the Porky Pig mug.The mating call of the corn holing faggot.
When one poofter hears another one fart, he responds, either with a fart of his own or verbally.
Rowdy Texas poofters call out "Chow Time!"
High-class poofters say, "Dinner Call!"
When one poofter hears another one fart, he responds, either with a fart of his own or verbally.
Rowdy Texas poofters call out "Chow Time!"
High-class poofters say, "Dinner Call!"
Not wanting to waste a lot of time talking, Armistead traipsed into a gay bar, lifted his leg a trifle, and blasted out a tremendous fart. The stentorian trumpet call echoed through the room and drew many approving glances.
Tex hollered "Hot damn! He's brought out the big guns!"
Lemony minced over to Armistead, bent over, and spoke sweet words to his arse:
Hail to thee, blithe Spirit!
Bird thou never wert
That from Heaven, or near it,
Pourest thy full heart
In profuse strains of unpremeditated art.
He inhaled through his nose, loud and long, then continued,
Like a rose embowered
In its own green leaves,
By warm winds deflowered,
Till the scent it gives.
"You'll do fine," said Armistead as he took Lemony's fluttering wrist and escorted him from the bar.
Tex hollered "Hot damn! He's brought out the big guns!"
Lemony minced over to Armistead, bent over, and spoke sweet words to his arse:
Hail to thee, blithe Spirit!
Bird thou never wert
That from Heaven, or near it,
Pourest thy full heart
In profuse strains of unpremeditated art.
He inhaled through his nose, loud and long, then continued,
Like a rose embowered
In its own green leaves,
By warm winds deflowered,
Till the scent it gives.
"You'll do fine," said Armistead as he took Lemony's fluttering wrist and escorted him from the bar.
by Cap'n Bullmoose November 11, 2006
Get the fart mug.A person who lives in a nice timber and stone house filled with wooden furniture, who advocates a total ban on cutting trees and mining. This person is inevitably a city-dweller, but acts as if he knows what is best for people in rural environments, especially those dependent on timber cutting or mining. This makes an environmentalist as popular as a turd in the punch bowl in rural places. An environmentalist uses liberal judges sitting in courts of law, rather than the legislative process, to shove his plans down everyone else's throat.
Recently, some environmentalists have recognized that they do not appeal to rank and file citizens of the USA. This is good news.
Compare an environmentalist with a conservationist, a person who wants to protect natural resources without trampling on everyone else's property rights. Typical conservationists are hunters, fishermen, campers, and hikers.
Recently, some environmentalists have recognized that they do not appeal to rank and file citizens of the USA. This is good news.
Compare an environmentalist with a conservationist, a person who wants to protect natural resources without trampling on everyone else's property rights. Typical conservationists are hunters, fishermen, campers, and hikers.
Environmentalists recommend turning grizzly bears loose in populated areas of Colorado. They do not advocate turning grizzly bears loose in populated areas of Massachusetts. "Not in MY back yard, they say."
by Cap'n Bullmoose May 6, 2005
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