8 definitions by Brettuthius
The condition when waking up after a long (usually drunken) night of smoking many harsh cigarettes that you aren't used to smoking. It is similar to having a lung over, but much worse. A victim of lung coma will find it hard to have their first cigarette of the day, sustain any physical movement, and in some cases, they find themselves without enough wind to complete sentences without taking a breath mid-sentence.
Phillippides: Hey Dad - we should hit up the Around the World mini-golf course a few blocks away. I'll race you there!
Philomelos: Sorry kiddo-beano, I've (gasp) got a nasty lung coma. Not sure if I could (gasp) even hit the ball up the Rickshaw Hill.
Phillippides: You should switch to American Spirits, Dad.
Philomelos: Sorry kiddo-beano, I've (gasp) got a nasty lung coma. Not sure if I could (gasp) even hit the ball up the Rickshaw Hill.
Phillippides: You should switch to American Spirits, Dad.
by Brettuthius August 7, 2007
A fart that instead traveling out to the side or rear of the buttocks, travels forward rolling up past the balls and taint area. It offers a straight-to-the-face delivery making the smell worse than usual.
Diby fired such a mean fart roll up while driving back from Buffalo Wild Wings that he needed to open the windows and decline his seat to avoid getting his eyes burned.
by Brettuthius December 13, 2008
We can only examine events in the past which never prove the future. The future has too many past experiences to know what the future holds. However, if we predict the future, there is a small chance that our prediction will be 100% correct. So instead of hoping that the past will predict the future, we will simply use the present to predict the future.
I used to predict the future back in 1987 but it never turned out because I didn't know the future. Knowing what I know now from the past, I can predict the future a bit better. Only time will tell if my prediction is correct. The past is never perfect but the future has a chance to be perfect!
by Brettuthius August 12, 2018
A bowel movement that is so large and wide that it ends all future shits. Such a shit only occurs after 12-24 hours of eating large, greasy, and out-right disgusting meals such as as Taco Bell, Jack-in-the-Box, chili dogs, or other comparable foods that you are not experienced with. It is a shit that typically lasts 20 minutes to 1 hours, very painful, and causes body-wide convolutions. This shit is believed to be your last no matter what may be consumed in the future, having you believe that you have shit out all of your future shits before you have had them.
OMG, dude. After going for breaking the 16 record from that Crave Case from White Castle, I took a WW I shit. I had my phone next to me just in case I had to call 911. It took numerous flushes as well as 3 plungers to get it down. Next time I'll let Sheeky take my place in the competition while I order fries, a milkshake, and a medium Mountain Dew. He is a stronger man than I will ever dream of.
by Brettuthius September 16, 2007
A derogatory term for persons related to slaves that were brought to areas in the Caribbean and South America and forced to work on sugar cane plantations (which were needed to produce molasses, a key ingredient in producing rum). This term is usually only used when referring to a person of Puerto Rican descent, due to Puerto Rico being the capital of rum production.
Our vacation to Puerto Rico was quite unforgettable due to the fact that Heather had her purse snatched by some rum slave. We had to make an unplanned venture the cruise ship to have more traveler's checks issued, which forced us to cancel our plans to go rain forest hiking.
by Brettuthius June 22, 2007
When you are old enough to remember events that happened 10-15 years ago but can't quite remember the exact details of the story. This is usually solved by asking others who were present to fill in the details. This type of dementia can be caused by several factors including drinking, having too many experiences, or by simply not choosing to remember your horrible past.
I can't believe I was actually at a Spin-Doctors concert. Many thanks to my Middle-aged Onset Dementia for helping me not remember that part of my life.
by Brettuthius June 26, 2011
When a man likes to hang out with other men and participate in manly events such as drinking, fishing, baseball, or any other 'manly' or male bonding event. It should never be confused with 'loving men', which is just 100% gay. It is only used to represent the fact that one man enjoys the company of other men in certain situations, keeping all shopping, make-up, period, and baby conversations a big no-no.
It kinda sucks that we couldn't get any girls to this camping party. Then again, I like men, so it's not so bad.
The new hot girl won't go out to lunch with us to the new burrito place? That sucks, but thank god I like men.
The new hot girl won't go out to lunch with us to the new burrito place? That sucks, but thank god I like men.
by Brettuthius April 25, 2008