13 definitions by Alfonso T. Watt

Top Definition
1. A raunchy skank of a cumdump (m) or (f) who whores out every possible bodily orifice for a ridiculous amount of vociferous and usually heinous eye-popping fucking. Having ones mouth, vagina, anus, ears, glass eye. nose, armpits and quite possibly feet slathered with loads of milky funky spunk. Usually consisting of but not limited to: vagrants precious bodily fluids, the football teams cream squirts, a visit by the clergy and or a facial and cumbath by a wispy group of hair dressers all named Philip. These unbridled sperm receptacles are usually chock full o' various unchecked/untreated STDs.

2. The name of the swell fishing boat in the movie "Cabin Boy".
That skank of a Filthy Whore Babs enjoyed having all fifteen of those sweaty, flea-bitten, smelly, drunk and angry winos fill her raw with their juices and pus filled syphillitic dicks every Wednesday while inside the garbage dumpsters behind Wal-mart.
by Alfonso T. Watt May 08, 2010
When a middle aged man in a cheap sport coat and polyester trousers walks by briskly and very stifly, revealing no discernable rhythm or style in an effort not to break the potato chip stuffed deep inside his rectum. This is all an effort to hide the fact he runs like a little school girl.
"Look at Sgt. Joe Friday struttin' a chip like he means business"
by Alfonso T. Watt May 08, 2010
A whistle lisp is defined by producing a slight whistling noise when pronouncing words beginning with "s" or "sh". Most noticible when conversing with elderly gay men with possible dental or identity issues.
Mr. Herbert ssssssaid that SSSSSweet SSSSSam'sssssss sssssalute wasssssss ssssssloppy and sssssaucy. He sssssent Ssssssam sssssstateside to practicccccccce that sssssssaucy sssssalute. These words all have a whistle lisp.
by Alfonso T. Watt May 15, 2010
A Juice Bag exhibits the same utterly exasperating character flaws as a Douche Bag or a Dirt Bag but usually a bit more effeminate. It usually responds with attitude to the name "Dave".
Wow! That toad Dave put gunpowder in all the ashtrays at that punk kegger in the Cardinal Apartments. Watta Juice Bag!
by Alfonso T. Watt May 10, 2010
Sebacious substance found on or inside ones genitalia after raucous debasement of a coworker (or many coworkers, subordinates and complete strangers) while at work. This disease is strictly indiginous to the Fox Valley area in Illinois. Named for a stellar insurance executive, and all around swell guy who made this type of behavior an art form.
Oh snaaaaaap, I got that nasty tarvin all over me after giving it to that dolt Wimer Beesley about that sloppy amendment.
by Alfonso T. Watt June 03, 2010
Every possible secretion emanating from a human body is considered a precious bodily fluid. Sweat, blood, menstruative residue, plasma, feces (solid or liquid will work here), ejaculate, urine, bile, phlegm, pus and last but certainly not least...vomit.
That dolt Wilmer Beesley was obsessive compulsive about collecting Precious Bodily Fluids. He particularly enjoyed the specimens he pilfered from various dank and humid dirty public toilets in large train stations.
by Alfonso T. Watt June 04, 2010
A completely irrelevant mope of a douchebag. Cretins possess exceptionally low intelligence and street smarts, are aroused by bathroom humour and above all love to play idiotic practical jokes. A cretin is generally reared in either a rural or suburban setting and therefore lacks many social graces necessary for sexy urban life. A cretin left to it's own devices eventually implodes in on itself. Cretins require excessive amounts of ritalin and/or Flintstones chewable vitamins. Finally they tend to respond to the name Dave.
That fucktard Dave is such a cretin. He put gunpowder in all the ashtrays at the kegger over at the Cardinal Apartments last night. What a douchebag.
by Alfonso T. Watt May 11, 2010
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