2014_chiguy's definitions

pothole paranoia

The extreme fear of running over a pothole. Habits of those with this affliction include driving under the speed limit, swerving frequently to avoid any cracks or bumps in the road, and taking alternative routes despite an increased commute. This usually sets in shortly after blowing a tire when running over a pothole.

Joe: Why were you guys late for work today?

Mike: Jeff took a strange route and drove under the speed limit the whole way.

Joe: Pothole paranoia claims another victim.

by 2014_chiguy January 15, 2014

family ATM

The member of the family who everyone else has to borrow money from. This person has disposable income because he or she made all the right choices in life.

Joe: Why are you using your credit card? Is everything okay?

Tom: I let my mom borrow $200 last week. My brothers also owe me $300 each.

Joe: Family ATM?

Tom: Yep.

by 2014_chiguy August 20, 2013

hashtagaholic

Someone who obsessively uses the word hashtag during conversation.

Joe: What did you do this weekend?

Mike: I binge watched Breaking Bad. Hashtag awesome.

Joe: You're a hashtagaholic. You need help.

by 2014_chiguy May 9, 2014

booty move

an action you perform that forces someone to call you a dumb ass

James: Joe chucked a beer bottle at that cop.

Frank: What a booty move.

by 2014_chiguy December 13, 2007

laughing tears

to laugh so hard that you cry a little

Dane Cook had me laughing tears at his show. He is truly a silly bitch.

by 2014_chiguy November 26, 2007

Smirnoff intolerant

Unable to drink Smirnoff vodka without getting sick.

Joe: What are you grabbing from the liquor store?
Moe: Some Smirnoff and Amp.
Joe: Dude, I can't drink that shit. It make me sick.
Moe: God damn! Half this fuckin' town is Smirnoff intolerant!

by 2014_chiguy April 28, 2009

go righty

When a left handed person is forced to masturbate with his right hand

Joe: What happened to your wrist?

Mike: I sprained it at the gym. I've gotta go righty for the next two weeks.

Joe: That sucks.

by 2014_chiguy June 5, 2013