n. two males who live together and often sleep in the same bed in a neighborhood where giant canaries, coke fiend mastadons, cookie enthusiasts, vampires with a fettish for numbers, a talking carpet who is disgruntled and live in a trash can, and a doll who begs to be "tickled" terrorize deaf mutes and a Latina woman usually named Maria
by Jupiter Armstrong April 17, 2004

Derogatory term for two gay males. This can be a noun to describe someone, a noun to describe an act, and an adjective.
Noun1: Heh heh, check out Bert and Ernie!
Noun2: Ew! They were in the bathroom doin' the Bert and Ernie!
Adjective: Those two homos are so Bert and Ernie!
Noun2: Ew! They were in the bathroom doin' the Bert and Ernie!
Adjective: Those two homos are so Bert and Ernie!
by The Protagonist August 22, 2005

by Intrepid Traveler April 12, 2012

A sexual position originating from Bristol involving two men - similar to the infamous '69', both participants simultaneously receive oral sex by lying in opposite directions. However, the 'Bert and Ernie' has the two participants lying firstly in foetal position, then when things get more intense, the participants wrap their legs around each other's heads, creating a 'Ying-Yang' effect. This allows the position to become mobile, and the participants are then free to move around the bed, even letting them leave the bedroom and roll through the house.
Tom: "Hey dude do you wanna try the Bert and Ernie?"
Odell: "Yeah man isn't that the one where we roll around like a transformer?"
Tom: "I know a guy who tried it and said it really broadens the mind"
Odell: "I'm down."
Odell: "Yeah man isn't that the one where we roll around like a transformer?"
Tom: "I know a guy who tried it and said it really broadens the mind"
Odell: "I'm down."
by Brother Ernie May 05, 2021

A girl who is having a threesome with two guys, gets them rock hard and then leaves to get condoms, never returning, leaving two erect men in a room alone together.
-"I pretty much used these douchebags for drinks all night and when we got back to their place.."
-"You fucked them?"
-"Nope, Bert and Ernie."
-"You fucked them?"
-"Nope, Bert and Ernie."
by mrsclaaaaark August 20, 2011

refers to an usually fat middle-aged woman's saggy rack, supposedly because they resemble the character Bert from the children's TV show Sesame Street's long oval-shaped head.
by PaigeParanoiaa February 21, 2009
