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pimz

A rare Canadian tree with the sole function of bestowing maple bacon onto all those who discover it. Do not approach this sentient plant quickly, as it will become startled and fecal matter will rain down from its branches. Though it is a particularly short tree, many would still find this rather inconvenient and, in a way, disgusting.

The tree's origin is not yet known, though it is thought to be from the mating of an angry, drunken Canadian maple tree and a swine.
Beware the deep Canadian forest, for you never know when you will encounter the majestic pimz.
by derpmentus September 2, 2016
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