i-Torch

n. When you use your I-Pod as a torch at night or in dark places.

"Man it's dark out here."
"Hey, I'll turn on my i-Torch then we'll get to the car."

by Jennings Laws January 28, 2009

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Everything i touch turns to shit!

A feeling of things not going your way. When you screw things up.

I've dated two guys in the last couple of months and they both rejected me in the end. Everything I touch turns to shit!

by Mr XXXXXXXXx May 2, 2012

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I touch myself

masturbation; erotic self-stimulation

The lyrics to the early 1990's pop-hit song "I Touch Myself" (by The Divinyls) left very little doubt what this phrase meant.

I love myself
I want you to love me
When I'm feelin' down
I want you above me
(...)
I don't want anybody else
When I think about you
I touch myself
(...)

by Allen W July 30, 2008

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I touch goats

"I Touch Goats" started off years ago as a standing joke in the Subaru Impreza Driver's Club forums. When the switch to a new forum happened, they gained a fully functional Personal Messaging system with online alerts.

Because of that the need for topics or posts advising people they had a personal message became redundant. By use of the swear filter, common permutations of you have personal message type posts (you have PM etc) are automatically changed to "I touch goats"

The actual origin of "goat-talk" precedes this however, which it is said to have some sort of homosexual connotation, perhaps some sort of off-joke. Anyway, its just a bit of fun...

Spreading outward from the SIDC, this has become near commonplace in many regions throughout the UK, particularly Carterton, Oxfordshire where their connection to their goats is particularly strong.

Poster One: mate, 'I touch goats'

Poster Two: You do what?!?

Poster One: Erm, I meant you have a private message - what happened there?!?

Poster Two: Ha ha, you touch goats!

by MattyWR1 May 10, 2011

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