Floor Jam (noun):
/ˈflɔ r ˌdʒæm/
1. A once-proud packet of fruit spread that briefly embarked on a solo journey across the restaurant floor, only to be scooped up, dusted off, and served with unearned confidence.
2. Culinary betrayal in condiment form.
3. A gourmet condiment that’s been lovingly marinated on the floor for 3-5 seconds before being returned to your plate by a server with the boldness of a street magician and the hygiene standards of a raccoon
Bonus synonym: Rogue preserve
/ˈflɔ r ˌdʒæm/
1. A once-proud packet of fruit spread that briefly embarked on a solo journey across the restaurant floor, only to be scooped up, dusted off, and served with unearned confidence.
2. Culinary betrayal in condiment form.
3. A gourmet condiment that’s been lovingly marinated on the floor for 3-5 seconds before being returned to your plate by a server with the boldness of a street magician and the hygiene standards of a raccoon
Bonus synonym: Rogue preserve
Example sentence:
“I asked for raspberry jam, not floor jam. There’s a difference—and it’s about 10 seconds of rolling time.”
“I asked for raspberry jam, not floor jam. There’s a difference—and it’s about 10 seconds of rolling time.”
by P73 Fox May 31, 2025
Floor Jam (noun):
/ˈflɔ r ˌdʒæm/
1. A once-proud packet of fruit spread that briefly embarked on a solo journey across the restaurant floor, only to be scooped up, dusted off, and served with unearned confidence.
2. Culinary betrayal in condiment form.
3. A gourmet condiment that’s been lovingly marinated on the floor for 3-5 seconds before being returned to your plate by a server with the boldness of a street magician and the hygiene standards of a raccoon
Bonus synonym: Rogue preserve
/ˈflɔ r ˌdʒæm/
1. A once-proud packet of fruit spread that briefly embarked on a solo journey across the restaurant floor, only to be scooped up, dusted off, and served with unearned confidence.
2. Culinary betrayal in condiment form.
3. A gourmet condiment that’s been lovingly marinated on the floor for 3-5 seconds before being returned to your plate by a server with the boldness of a street magician and the hygiene standards of a raccoon
Bonus synonym: Rogue preserve
Example sentence:
“I asked for raspberry jam, not floor jam. There’s a difference—and it’s about 10 seconds of rolling time.”
“I asked for raspberry jam, not floor jam. There’s a difference—and it’s about 10 seconds of rolling time.”
by P73 Fox May 31, 2025