Oh where to begin with the fashion bear? Is it even possible for one to define the existence of such a rare and divine beast? The fashion bear derives from the species that we homosapiens have named Ursidae (also known as the bear). Unlike the common black bear or brown bear, the fashion bear changes their lucious fur coats with the seasons, however the wind blows as some might say. Not only is the fashion bear in the know of the latest fashion trends of Paris, but they actually predict trends decades before they even surface. The fashion bear exclusively listens to the indie rock band Modest Mouse, and eats only farm fresh Gallus gallus domesticus (also known as chickens). At times they may come off as a bit pretentious, however it is always a true gift to be in the presence of a fashion bear.
I was horribly embarrassed yesterday when I came into contact with a fashion bear. I had absurdly left my domicile whilst wearing sweat pants and the fashion bear looked directly into my soul and shook his head with disappointment.
by I am the real Bill Murray January 26, 2018