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dildocam 

A small, poor quality camera. Often the mega-pixels are at highest, a 3. Photos are often grainy, blurry, and cannot focus on an object.
Oh hai, I love photography and I plan on going to an art institute to show off the skills I have. Do you think pictures I take with my dildocam will make it? They're blurry but I managed to sharpen them on my illegal copy of photoshop.
dildocam by ashleymalicious July 6, 2010
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Spunky Dildohammer 

Obtain a jar of japanese mayonnaise and slather your stale hawt dawg with it. Tell your blind or visually impaired sexin' woman that you're gonna pleasure her with a dildo and butt plug. Lube up a dildo and butt plug in front of her. Stuff the butt plug in her beaver and jam your mayonnaised schlong into her mudflaps. She'll think it's the dildo, til you squirt your baby gravy in there. Then thwap your shrinking dong on her breasts. You must eat half of a Wild Berry Pop Tart during this process, and when you've finished jam the other half into her fuzzy cumdumpster.
Tom Selleck: hey babe want me to rub my moustache on you tonight?
Someone's Mom: Nah. I'm in the mood for plastic tonight.
Tom Selleck: PREPARE TO BE PULVERIZED!
(5 min. later)
Someone's mom: OMG that wasn't a dildo! That was a Spunky Dildohammer
Tom Selleck: I know.
Related Words

dildocake 

1) The crust that forms around a dildo if it has not been cleaned. This can vary from a yellowish, fish scented cake to a brown, moldy shit scented cake.
2) A generic insult
She needs to wash that dildo! It smells like a harbor and that cake is as think as my birthday cake was!

Get out of my way Dildocake!
dildocake by probie November 15, 2005

dildocals 

Person on Twitter

Has much humour and is overall a very sympathetic person
Person A: ,,Did you heard of dildocals?!"
Person B: ,,The person on Twitter?"
Person A: ,,Yes they're so cool!!"
dildocals by f4mousl4stw0rds August 28, 2022

dildo cam 

a device used in porn. dildo with miniature camera connected to wireless network, which shows what's happening inside the vagina
dildo cam allows to stream your pleasure right to the internet
dildo cam by dildo777 March 21, 2024