chapped penis 

This is a condition whereby the penis become dry and possibly cracked. It may be caused by the evaporation of moisture due to having too much sexy time outdoors during the cold winter months.

Dave: Hey, Steve. I heard you had intercourse with Tracy yesterday in the park. I bet that was super!
Steve: Yes, it was A-OK ... until I woke up today with a chapped penis.

chapped penis by Craig McJohnstone January 28, 2009