ass to mouth resuscitation 

Verb;

As an alternative to 'mouth to mouth resuscitation', ass to mouth or ass-to-mouth is the preferred method to revive turtles who have choked on jellybeans, or your friends sister who is a college freshman at her first frat party, passed out on blueberry vodka. Acceptable because turtles smell like shit and alcohol kills the taste of anything other than Taco Bell.

April O'Neil, a broadcasting and electronic media major with a minor in journalism is passed out on a brown couch, after ingesting too much blueberry vodka. Her tits are exposed from her yellow jacket, and her red hair is tied back in pig tails. She is tight as fuck.

Leonardo: Look at April O'Neil, dapt bitch is fuckin wastid nigga!

Raphael: Damn shawty. Ey, who be wandin some Taco Bale?

Leonardo: Wake dapt bi'atch up n see if she wan'somethin.

Raphael: Ay whide bitch, wake de fuck up, fa'real.

Leonardo: Ey mane, she kinda looks blue n shit. You better gib her ass to mouth resuscitation, niggin!

Raphael: Fa real?

Leonardo: Yeah niggin, we'll wait til we gets back wit dapt TB, niggin.

A little while later...

Leonardo: Aight niggin, ju ready mane?

(dropping his pants, and straddling Aprils face, Raphael situates his anus over her mouth and flatuates, blowing stool chips into Aprils air stream)

Raphael: Cowabunga dude!

ass to mouth resuscitation by Master of Pock Suppets March 2, 2009

Ass-to-Mouth Resuscitation 

Ass-to-Mouth Resuscitation is the hilarious task of reviving somebody who is asleep or passed out by spreading ones naked butt cheeks and positioning it over a recipients mouth and farting into it. It is much better when witnessed by people who are trying to contain their laughter until the procedure has been successful. Compared to its more well known cousin 'mouth-to-mouth resuscitation', Ass-to-Mouth Resuscitation is an often thankless alternative, and if the recipient is woken by it, their response can range from aggressiveness, nausea and laughter, sometimes the recipient may experience all three of these symptoms. Ass-to-Mouth Resuscitation or 'ATM' as it's affectionately known can also be used to boost morale of those witnessing the said procedure, and the fond memories would never cease to bring tears of laughter to their eyes for years to come.

Mike:"Haha Rowan got hammered last night and is still passed out on the kitchen floor"
James: "Wow do you think we should try Ass-to-Mouth Resuscitation?"
Mike:"Lol yeah but we need to film so we'll get Kev in here, he can film it"

Ass-to-Mouth Resuscitation by Captain Andy Pants January 3, 2020