Westminster Choir
College (WCC) is one of the greatest choir schools in the
world, mainly because it is the only choir school in the
world. Located in Princeton, NJ, WCC is the satellite music school of Rider University, although none of Westminster's students
will admit that openly because of a lack of funding and appreciation shown from their university.
Westminster's gay
men to straight
men ratio is approximately 4:1, which causes their women to experiment with their asexuality. Students at Westminster can often be
seen pulling out large chunks of their hair and weeping in practice rooms during late hours of the evenings while they try to prepare solfege singing exercises and keyboard
harmony assignments for their theory classes unsuccessfully. Another cause of tension amongst students revolves around the exorbitant cost of tuition; from the cost of attendance, sheet music, formalwear, and private lessons, many students are forced to transfer to state schools before they can complete their programs of study. The most common degree program, Music
Education, is host to some of the most stressed and sexually frustrated students in the modern post-secondary world. Because of this, Westminster is also referred to as "Stressminster Queer
College".
In spite of all the academic pressure and frequent feelings of impending doom, most students who attend Westminster are bound together by both their commiseration and their love of music, creating an unbreakable sense of family.
High school student: I'm going to Westminster Choir
College to study music education!
Normal person: Isn't it less expensive to commit
suicide?
Person: Where do you go to school?
WCC student: Westminster Choir
College!
Person: Oh, Westminster College in Pennsylvania?
WCC student:...No, are you stupid? I go to school in Princeton, NJ.
Person: Oh, you go to school at Princeton University?
WCC student: NO! I go to WESTMINSTER CHOIR COLLEGE of RIDER UNIVERSITY!
Person: Oh, so you go to RIDER?
WCC student: *breaks whatever they are holding and walks away*
