Uncle Jemima: Let me ask you a question: you like drinking? Well, you like drinking - who the hell don't? Well if you're like me, then you like to get bit just as fast as possible. That's why I'm proud to introduce to you...Uncle Jemima's Pure Mash Liquor. I'm Uncle Jemima! You probably know my wife, Aunt Jemima, the pancake lady! Now she says that selling booze is degrading to our people. I always say that black folk ain't exactly swellin' up with pride on the count of you flippin' flapjack. Ain't I right Sammy?

Sammy: Listen don't get me in this mess.

Then she say "why booze?" I say "Sell what you know, and I know about booze!" Uncle Jemima's Pure Mash Liquor has a 95% alcohol content - and that's per volume!

What the hell does that mean?

That means you get f***ed up for less money! Hook a brother up! Buy some of my pure mash liquor and let's show that old bitch that there's more to this world than just making pancake!

Aunt Jemima: Pancakes is ready!

Uncle Jemima: Oh you shut up woman! You're not gonna ruin this for me!

Sammy: What you swattin' at?

Bro since I got dirtpilled on Tuesday I have made sooo many worm friends and made them soo many little houses to get married in. Me? Lonely? No you’re the lonely one u lawn owning freak

Hey Thad, rub that maple syrup on my pucker and then back over here with your pants down. I had burritos for lunch and I want to give you an uncle jemima. (also known as the gay shotgun)

Yo Yo, My name is UncleJemima I TK people, I stole my name off SNL.